


You Make Me Want To Sin

by lonelymisfit



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Fraternity, Anal Sex, Bad Jokes, Bottom Louis, Coming Out, Coming Untouched, Falling In Love, First Time, First Time Blow Jobs, Fluff, Football Player Louis, Frat Boy Louis, Frat Boy Zayn, Kissing, M/M, Masturbation, Opposites Attract, Pining, Religious Content, Shy Harry, Top Harry, Virgin Harry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-22
Updated: 2017-03-22
Packaged: 2018-10-08 12:24:05
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 28,628
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10386600
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lonelymisfit/pseuds/lonelymisfit
Summary: Typical stereotype for frat boys consists of non existent mannerisms and bad taste in colour schemes for matching clothing. At least that's what Harry's heard since he's started in college. Don't forget the massive ego, the tons of alcohol and school funding that gets wasted every year behind these dickheads but Harry doesn't have a thing to worry about right? He's never going to cross paths with those type of selfish people. Except he does. Looks like faith had another thing in store for Harry when he comes across the very loud and free spirited Louis Tomlinson. Captain of the school's football team and president of the Delta Psi U fraternity that has Harry questioning everything his life consisted of up until now.Or the very bregruding college AU where Louis is a bad ass frat boy and Harry is a shy and conservative catholic boy who wants to know whether Louis can show him what else he can do on his knees besides pray.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is set in an American theme and since I'm not an American I want to apologise for anything that I may have gotten wrong.
> 
> Also before you proceed any further there are very strong mentions of religion and if that's a touchy subject to you then I deeply apologise, no way am I trying to degrading someone's religion but if you feel it may offend you then I suggest you do not read. 
> 
> This is unbeta'ed as usual and all mistakes are my own.  
> Please leave feedback you know it makes my day seeing how much you enjoy what I do :) xoxo

Fifteen more minutes until game time. Fifteen more bloody minutes and Louis’ skin is itching with excitement, the loud buzz of laughter and profanities being shouted from his fellow teammates in this crowded locker room. He’s been waiting for this game since semester started just so he can fucking crush that roach of a midfielder, Justin from the Celtic Panthers. The players are pumped, he can hear the crowd outside chanting his name and it sends a pleasant feeling through his body. He’s not a hot head, he’s worked hard to become where he is today. Star player of the Mighty Sparrows and President of the Delta Psi U fraternity so of course if he gets this much attention right now he’s not complaining, being captain of one of the most prestigious football team does that to a fella. Another perk was that it made Louis a household name in this dreaded school earning the title of _“Tommo the tease”_ among his peers. But that’s a story for another time. Anyway, what can he say? Life is good.

He scrubs his hands over his face, body jumping with adrenaline as the minutes tick by coming closer and closer to the big start. Players pass by him on the bench clapping their hands over his back saying things like _we’ve got this captain! Go mighty sparrows! Tommo for the win!_ It more than left Louis with a satisfying buzz within himself, overly confident that this game was already theirs. One of the players, forward #8 Zayn Malik also Vice President of Delta and Louis’ best friend since freshman year comes to sit next to him. Zayn squeezes his shoulders in comfort and pats his thighs before he actually takes a seat.

“You okay little sparrow?” He’s more than okay right now he feels so jubilant he doesn’t comment on the horrid nickname like he normally would do. Thing is, Louis is not small, he doesn’t know where these idiots got that idea from, he’s fucking five feet and nine inches tall. Half of the players are about that same height and no one calls _them_ small. Even though that one time, this dickhead named Chase also from his team actually found measuring tape and held Louis down to prove he was not in fact the height he said he was. Louis seemed to remember the incident differently even though he’s sure the tape was inaccurate no matter what Chase said he’ll stick with the assumption that he was in fact 5”9.

Getting back to current problems however, he knows Zayn by now, an open book. He’s seen this too many times, the crooked smile, the dopey look in his eyes, the hand practically cutting off the circulation on Louis’ thighs. Yes. Louis is sure he knows what this is about.

“Let’s cut the crap about this conversation being about me and tell me what’s bothering you?” And it’s always the same response.

“He’s here” is all Zayn says and Louis has to laugh even though Zayn shoots him a glare, his pouty face turning into one of horror and realisation. Zayn’s stupidly beautiful golden brown eyes widen to stare at Louis, his long lashes hitting the top of his eyebrows, his lips frown and looks almost like he’s about to cry.

“He’s here! Fuck! Lou he’s here!” He stands pulling at his high, perfectly quiffed hair (fucking unfair seriously) his shirtless chest glistening with sweat or is it water from his recent shower? Either way he’s freaking the fuck out for some boy on the stands that has been to every game they played. Louis has noticed even though Zayn didn’t exactly make it subtle and chanted it like a fucking pray in his ear. A boy who probably doesn’t even know he exists. Okay he does, everyone knows Zayn Malik, stupidly beautiful Zayn Malik. However, that’s not the point anyway the point is Zayn can get who he wanted he had people who wanted him and people who wanted to _be_ him yet he gets cold feet for a nerd who probably only shows up to said games just so they can say they have a social life. Pathetic. Louis feels sorry for Zayn, luckily he is not the type to go for quiet shy ones or ones who absolutely have no idea who he is and what he’s capable of.

“Listen Z, he’s here so what? This is the biggest game of the year and I will not have you fuck it up because you have some dumb crush on a bleacher who probably plays the flute”

That was harsher than intended but Zayn needed this. There was no way he was going to get side tracked when they were this close to rubbing Justin’s face in the dirty with his shoes.

“Stop making fun of him Louis!” Zayn protests flopping down on the bench again beside Louis. “It’s just-“ he runs his hands through his hair still managing to stay up (fucking how? Louis meant to ask so many times maybe it’s that trick Cameron did in There’s something about Mary) “he’s incredibly beautiful Lou and I get all fuzzy when he looks at me… well I think he looks at me? God I’m so stupid! Of course he looks at me I’m on the field, he’s at the game” he huffs out a breath and Louis wants to put him out of his misery he really does. Zayn getting this worked up over something is truly exhausting which would only result in long nights of whining about said bleacher boy while smoking countless joints and emptying his bank account on cheap whiskey. Louis should help.

“When we win I promise today is the day he talks to you. I’ll make sure of it” Zayn’s already got that stupid smile on his face so Louis continues “but for right now we have to get our head in this game” Zayn nods trying to be serious but can’t help the smile bursting out on his face. Zayn crushes him in his arms lifting him off the ground and spinning him in a hug. He places a kiss on Louis’ forehead some of the players cat calling both of them. Louis flipping them off when Zayn let’s go of him to smile and gently squeeze his arm before letting go.

 

\---

 

They lost. 3-1 the final score. Justin was more the prancing fool with the outcome throwing his hands in the air and doing some stupid dance that make him look like a fucking chicken Louis did nothing but laugh. It was devastating to lose but he can’t even think of it when he watches Zayn who has his eyes trained on the stands searching for the familiar figure in the dispersing crowd. He starts getting frantic throwing looks over to Louis as Justin’s annoying voice echoes from nearby.

“Now what was it that you said you were going to rub on my face?” he’s stroking his chin looking like an absolute buffoon, “if it’s not that glorious ass then I’m not interested” Justin together with his pack of wolves step in front Louis most of their shirts gone, sweat dripping down their tight muscular bodies and don’t get him wrong he appreciates a good body and Justin’s was no exception. Sure he was hot, in that asshole type of way but Louis wasn’t exactly into the types with big heads and small penises. He laughs at himself remembering the time when he almost had that small dick in his mouth but started laughing as soon as he dropped his pants.

“You couldn’t get this ass even if it was your dying breath” Louis simply states but causes Justin’s wolf pack to start howling “besides I’ll be too busy getting wasted at the frat tonight!” He shouts the ending of his sentence making a few of the players cheer. Louis bats his eyelashes sweetly and cocks his ass out a signature Louis Tomlinson move (the move that got him the name “tommo the tease”) sure enough had Justin swallowing and backing away without saying another word. Zayn appears not too long tugging on Louis’ shoulders.

“He’s over there Lou! He’s leaving!” Zayn points to the stands just as he sees the little specks of blond hair shifting down the stairs trying to pass through the masses of people. He also sees the tall one, he’s always with blond bleacher and that’s just great because Zayn didn’t think this through, maybe they were boyfriends. Zayn was cutting circulation out on his arms so he tugs away running to the other end of the field shouting trying to get the boy’s attention.

“Hey sweetie! Over here!” As soon as he says the words the blond boy isn’t the one who turns instead it’s the lanky stranger that grabs his attention. He slides his glasses up to his face before stopping to furrow his eyebrows and tilt his head as to question Louis if it’s him he’s talking to.

“No your friend! Your blond friend! Call him back!” The tall one’s face falls for a second but is quick to cover it as he makes to dash through the crowd pulling the blond by his arms.

“Niall wait!” He calls, his voice deep and raspy and certainly not what Louis was expecting. The blond turns in annoyance but his face lights up when tall one points to Louis on the field. Niall as the other boy said makes his way to the field the only thing separating them is the fence. He’s smiling ear to ear as he comes to press his face against said fence.

“Y-You’re Louis Tomlinson” Niall states the obvious. Louis snorts taking a step back so he’s not too close to this now creepy boy. He has to admire his enthusiasm though. He _is_ Louis Tomlinson. Best of the best.

“Last time I checked” Louis smiles trying his best to charm this boy for the sake of his best friend anyway.

“I can’t believe it! You’re Louis Tomlinson and you’re talking to me! Oh my gosh Harry pinch me” He makes a gesture to the boy behind him, Harry does as he’s told coming over to pinch Niall on the arm which makes him squeal and an unexpected snort to come from Louis. He had to cover his mouth. Harry looks at him through his lashes, dimples on display probably pleased with himself that he made Louis Tomlinson laugh.

“So I’m assuming you know who Zayn Malik is then?” Harry snickers behind clearly trying to hide as Niall turns beet red.

“Yeah he knows Zayn” Harry says fixing his beanie on his head. Something about his voice stirs a feeling inside Louis but he would never admit that out loud. It was inviting, so warm yet so rough at the same time and Louis needed to stop thinking because he’s sure the scent of the grass was fucking with his brain.

“I know all the players” Niall snaps back at Harry trying to hide his red ears and blotchy cheeks.

“Listen guys I don’t have much time but I’m having a party at the frat later and you’re invited” Niall looks like he’s about to go into cardio arrest. “Zayn said he wanted you there personally” Niall turned even redder, his eyes lighting up with excitement.

“O-Okay I’ll be there. See you Louis” Niall smiles backing away from the fence trying to catch his breath.

“Call me Tommo” Niall’s eyes widen at that looking to Harry like he just won the lottery or something. Harry had a weary look on his face and Louis didn’t miss it when he stepped away leaving him and Niall to talk as they made their way to the exit. Harry was frowning and shaking his head looking displeased with what Niall was saying. Louis shrugged looking back at Zayn who was still standing on the field with a few players. Louis gives him the thumbs up causing Zayn to smile wide sending an air kiss to him mouthing _I fucking love you_.  He couldn’t help but feel ecstatic for his best friend. He’s sure about one thing though, tonight was going to be a fucking sick night even though they lost, Delta’s parties were always the fucking best.

 

Niall didn’t show and Louis couldn’t get the shit feeling out his system because seeing Zayn moping around did make an impression on him too. He couldn’t even enjoy his own party when he knew Zayn was let down. It’s the absolute worse having to witness Zayn in one of his bad moods. He felt the sudden urge to find Niall and punch him straight in the face but then beg him to come over and just love Zayn. Louis vowed in that moment that he was going to do anything so Zayn never had that look on his face again. That’s when shit started going downhill.

 

\---

 

It wasn’t hard trying to fish student’s personal information when your name was Louis Tomlinson. The administrators at the office didn’t even bat an eyelash when he asked to look up some boy by the name of Niall. He didn’t know much other than his name but after a few interns looking it over for him he receives a text of a one Niall Horan who resides in the east wing of campus dorms with his roommate Harry Styles. Both science majors. Niall is (well fuck me down) a flute player in the bleachers and Harry was a revising minister in bible teaching, whatever the fuck that means anyway. Louis wasn’t really a religious person and Harry didn’t strike him as someone who would give up his life of flesh and physical desire to the Lord but then again no one really _looks_ religious. He tucks his phone into his pocket returning to the conversation on the lunch table. Some of the cheerleaders made their way over, Chase has his arms around two of them one by the name of Allie and he thinks the other one’s name is Danielle, not certain even though he knows she’s not very subtle in trying to keep this whole _I want to fuck you so hard Louis_ persona in check. And it’s not him being cocky, she’s tried too many times to hook up with him at parties only resulting in Louis walking the other way pretending she doesn’t even exist.

He smiles at Zayn giving him a secret wiggle of the brows and Zayn responds by biting his lips trying to hide his excitement. The crowd disperses when Calvin, one of the midfielder on the team announces that he had classes, the lot of them following his lead including his stuck up girlfriend Taylor who always pretend like she’s the sweetest person but Louis knows deep down she’s evil.

Zayn and Louis walk to the field so they’re finally alone, maybe have a quick game if there’s time but usually just to get away. Zayn passes him the ball after doing some kick ups waiting for Louis to relay the message.

“So?” Zayn prompts getting impatient. Louis stops the ball under his feet sighing before gesturing for Zayn to sit. They both do, sitting crossed legged from each other. Louis simply takes his phone out trying to remember every detail from the text about Niall. Once he rereads the message to Zayn he hears a gasp only to look over to see Zayn holding his head in his hands.

“That’s the block Perrie lives in” Louis frowns “you know the girl I dated last year?” Of course Louis remembers Perrie, they still hang out but if Zayn knew that he’d have his head. Louis kind of clung to her because she was so similar to him and it worked even though Zayn might not understand that very well.

“I can’t go over there Lou, you know our history she’ll think I want her back or something. I don’t need any more drama in my life” And Zayn is far too oblivious to things. Louis does in fact know that Perrie certainly wouldn’t think that way. She’s happy and at a good place right now, sure she was devastated when they broke up but she’s fine now more than fine actually it’s just amusing to know how Zayn feels in this situation though, since he never really speaks about her.

“So what do you want me to do? I got the information now it’s up to you” Louis makes to stand but Zayn holds onto his ankles pulling him back down.

“Oh please Lou, just do this! I’ll owe you. I promise” and who could say no when Zayn has that giant puppy dog face? That would get old eventually. He contemplates it for a minute only to get Zayn worked up even though he already knows he’d do anything for this man and this point. It’s an unspoken bond they share and he knows Zayn would do the same for him so he nods his head, Zayn toppling him over hugging and placing kisses all over his face.

“Thank you Lou love you!”

“Alright get off me you sap!” Louis dusts off his trousers and stands with the help of Zayn.

 

 

x

 

 He walks down this lone wing taking in the odd surroundings. This is definitely the first time he’s been over here so this is new territory. The halls had a weird smell like a mixture of sulphur and rain, there were old lockers bashed in and abandoned on the walls, a completely different environment from the frat. He holds his breath walking up the stairs going over to room 202 like the text suggest. He briefly thought of just texting Perrie but didn’t want to get her involved in Zayn related activities so he takes a deep breath and walks up to the door without second guessing himself, he knocks. Its a few moments until he hears crashing on the other side and a faint voice telling him they’re coming. The door flies open only to reveal not Niall but his dorky, bound to celibacy roommate Harry. He looks flustered to see Louis wiping his hands over his trousers, scrunching his face so his big framed glasses settle on the bridge of his nose. And Louis shouldn’t find that endearing but he does. Before Harry can get a word out though Louis is quick to speak.

“Is Niall here?” Harry looks disappointed probably hoping it was him Louis came to see and not Niall that much was evident on his face. He takes his glasses off shoving it in his hair, his very long brown flowing hair. Louis hadn’t notice before since it was tucked under his beanie the night of the game. Even though his hair was almost pass his shoulders it suited him and Louis never imagined long hair could look this breath taking on a person.

“Um well he’s not here” He’s sure a good church boy like Harry here knows better than to lie plain in someone’s face but he was doing so anyway and Louis was going to call him out on it.

“Now I know you mother taught you better than to lie to people didn’t she?” For a faint second Louis thinks he’s overstepped judging by the scowl on Harry’s face but it quickly shifts to something else as his eyes cast to the floor.

“She did” he answers then making to close the door right in Louis’ face. He pushes his foot in front that exact moment not thinking what a potential door injury could do to his fucking leg; the leg that made him a football star.

“So then you don’t mind if I come in?” He schools his face not thinking of the pain shooting from his below half. Shocked etched on Harry’s face and before he can stop he’s being pushed aside Louis sliding pass him to enter the room. Niall is definitely there sitting on the sofa playing video games his eyes never leaving the screen but he calls out to Harry.

“Who’s at the door Haz was it the pizza guy?” Louis looks back at Harry who had a pained expression on his face.

“Actually it’s me Niall how’s it going?” To the sound of Louis’ voice Niall’s head snaps to his direction dropping the controller. He stands making his way over to Harry and Louis his hands coming to cover his mouth.

“Louis Tomlinson is in my dorm!” He shrieks his knees wobbling as he speaks. Louis just laughs patting him on the shoulders.

“So how come you stood me up the night of the party? I was really expecting you two to show” he looks back at Harry who was no longer looking at him his expression to the floor, then back at Niall who’s trying to find the right words to say.

“I’m sorry I was coming it’s just-“

“We don’t do parties” Harry is the one who finishes.

“Okay?” Louis asks more confused than anything. Of course they didn’t do parties that was well understood but it was also understood that no one turns down an invite if it came from Louis, the fucking president of the fraternity.

“I’ve never been to a frat party before I guess I got a little scared.” Niall confesses and Harry just huffs walking off leaving both of them standing by the doorway.

“Honestly what the fuck is his problem?” Louis rolls his eyes as Harry walks away and Niall gasps. Not the first reaction he was expecting but Harry stops dead in his tracks turning back swiftly to come even more into Louis’ personal space. His eyes much darker than before the soft green turning more into a chaotic grey. Louis was not turned on. He wasn’t. He’s definitely not looking at the clench of Harry’s jaw that make the muscles on his face ripple or his nostrils flare. No because he’s supposed to feel fear right now wasn’t he? A church boy getting angry with him, yeah right.

Louis can smell him as soon as he steps forward something citrus and earthy maybe the scent of clean laundry.

“We do not use that kind of language in this house, nor ever” His eyebrows scrunch up the little crinkle between his brows prominent as he stares at Louis’ eyes. Nothing in the look is intimidating if anything it’s only inviting Louis to wreck this boy, he’s practically begging for it but Louis falls under the unspoken spell that is his eyes. Only does he realise he needs to say something.

“I-I’m-“Louis just stares at him fish mouthing words but nothing seems to come out. Harry dawning on his initial reaction backs away from Louis his expression turning afraid.

“I’m s-sorry I d-didn’t mean to” he says watching Louis but doesn’t wait for him to respond however he just bolts to his room.

“I’m sorry about Harry he’s just really sensitive when it comes to stuff like that” Still fucking confused as to what exactly just happened Louis blinks open mouthed at Niall scratching the back of his neck trying to come back to his usual self.

“Uh its okay I understand” He swallows “I just wanted to ask if it was okay for you to meet up for lunch.” Niall is blinking rapidly “Do you know the diner two blocks off campus?” Niall nods so he continues “great you can meet me there say around eleven? Is tomorrow good for you?” Niall looks unsure watching back to the direction Harry went before turning his attention back to Louis shaking his head very quietly.

“Why what’s wrong?” As if Louis didn’t already know the answer.

“Harry”

 

 

\---

 

“So he can’t go out because his virgin roommate made him take a stupid nonexistent vow of only being able to date when he can?” Now that Zayn repeats it it sounds way more ridiculous.

“That’s what he said something about ensuring the path of purity is not tainted by temptation”

“What kind of bullshit? Who does this virgin Mary think he is anyways he doesn’t own Niall”

“Yes Z I get that but I think they grew up together known each other longer than we have”

“Yes but I don’t tell you who to fuck and who not to”

“Well technically you do” Zayn pulls at his hair then proceeds to rest his hands on the kitchen counter.

“Should I get Liam to give him a beat down?” Upon hearing his name Liam comes to stand next to Zayn.

“Who do you want me to give a beat down?”

“You’re not getting my goalie to beat anyone Z you’re overacting just for some dick” Liam snorts patting Zayn on the shoulder and popping one of Louis’ grapes in his mouth. Louis slaps his hands away.

“Is this about the flute player? Tell me you’re not still on that Z” Liam shuffles over to the fridge to grab a bottle of water. Zayn watches him with a death glare as he chugs the water down his throat.

“What?” Liam asks stupidly when Zayn just won’t stop staring at him. Probably willing for his head to fall off. Maybe it did in a different realm but not this one unfortunately for Zayn.

“Louis did you forget to feed your pet he’s very snappy today” Zayn spits rolling his eyes at Liam. That made Louis chuckle popping another grape into his mouth Liam almost spitting his water clearly surprised by Zayn’s outburst. It’s not very often people get to see this side of Zayn – the scary part and now Liam knows why. He’s an absolute menace.

“Rude” Liam mutters slipping on the stool closer to Louis.

“What are we going to do now Lou?” Zayn huffs out a frustrated groan tugging at his hair. They stay in silence for a while the noise coming from the other brothers in the frat drowning around them. Liam looks at Zayn nibbling on his fingers and then over to Louis who is just casually eating his grapes.

“Just get a date for Virgin Mary and the flute player is yours” Liam had said face blank as he reaches to sneak another grape from Louis when Zayn slaps him on the arm. Zayn gives him a dope eyed smile his face lighting up with something like his brain is working overtime and Louis knows that look. Its trouble and not hard to assume what Zayn is insinuating.

“No absolutely fucking not” Louis is already shaking his head frantically making Zayn pout even more following him to the living room.

“Please Lou” he pulls Louis so he stops as a few of the brothers watching television whip their heads the spectacle seeming to grab their attention more than what they were watching. Liam emerges from the kitchen only to drop on the couch next to Chase watching as well.

“If you even think I would be caught dead with him” Louis doesn’t even think he can finish.

“You just have to buy me some time so I can ask Niall out”

”This is some ten things I hate about you shit. How ironic Harry Styles is Julia Stiles” Liam snickers causing the other brothers to laugh in unison.

“Lou get a mic and sing Frankie Valli that would win him over” His life is a mockery and Louis sees red when he looks over to the laughing boys. He really does feel like Heath Ledger right now but everyone knows how that movie ended and that’s the terrifying part for Louis.

“I have a reputation Malik” Louis knows how he must sound but he didn’t care he just didn’t want to do it no matter how stuck up and artificial he sounded.

“Well this just took a turn now it’s more like she’s all that”

“You mean that Freddie Prinze jr movie?” Liam and Chase exchange and Louis just couldn’t take it anymore.

“Will you two shut the fuck up?”

“Louis you’re being difficult besides you don’t know him maybe you’d like him if you gave him a chance. You didn’t like me when we first met but look at us now” Zayn had that hopeful look in his eyes again and Louis hated it because of course he was right. Louis remembers meeting Zayn like it was just yesterday. The football team was looking for fresh recruits and they had try outs. He remembers Zayn and his perfect eyes and perfect quiff intact even when he was sweaty and muddy from getting tackled even from the humidity and heat from the sun. His playing wasn’t bad either and Louis hated him for it. He showed it too on the field when they both got chosen as first string players. The coach having none of it pulling them out of matches until they learnt how get along with each other. Louis was of course pig headed and Zayn was unbothered so the players set out with a plan to get them to talk and only a frat party would make that happen. It was then that Louis finally bonded with Zayn the happy and super cuddly drunk rather than the usual stuck up aggressive football player. It took him getting used to but Louis eventually entertained the idea of having Zayn around a little more than he liked. He sighed watching around the room filled with his fellow brothers all looking at him with soft smiles. And he loved these idiots so much he’d do anything for them and that’s when he realised how selfish he’s being to Zayn. He’s never bat an eyelash when Louis shot him with ridiculous requests Zayn was always willing to entertain any idea Louis had. He can feel the tears well up when he looks at Zayn who is biting on his bottom lip so Louis just gives his best friend a single nod. Zayn’s eyes light up the small crowd erupt in applause sharing in glee as Zayn rushes up to Louis and envelopes him in his arms.

“I love you so much” Zayn places a smacking kiss on the crown of Louis’ head. He looks up seeing Zayn’s eyes shining with tears. Louis smiles feeling himself overcome with emotion only to clear his throat and release Zayn.

“Right well I’ll be in my room” He awkwardly shifts setting out to walk up the stairs. He looks back at Zayn still smiling dopily at him he mouths _thank you_ as the other boys settle back into their previous activities. Louis smiles nodding again. When he’s finally in his room he locks the door and looks around the empty space. It starts to sink in. He’s actually going to ask Harry Styles to go out with him. It hits him like a wave because fuck what did he get himself into?

 

\---

 

Usually Harry doesn’t get this ticked off he hasn’t come out of his room since the last four hours and Niall really starts to worry. Thing is he isn’t sure why Harry was this upset. What happened was like a miracle to Niall, here he had the guy he had a crush on since the beginning of school seeking him out and in the best way possible. His best friend the most gorgeous boy in school (well apart from Zayn) the boy everyone loves and wants to be, Louis Tomlinson wanted to be _his_ friend. Louis Tomlinson wanted him to go to his fraternity the place he’s been dreaming about seeing the inside for years. Of course their type of lifestyle isn’t one Niall is used to but he’s more open to understanding why they live the way they do and he wants to experience it wanted to try new things just generally curious of a life beside the one he owned. All his life it’s been church and his dedication to school which he isn’t contesting to not liking what he does, it just gets to routine to him making his every move almost predictable. He wanted to be like those people who were free and did what they wanted. The type of people that would party all night and wake up sober the next morning only to do it again the very next night. He wanted to embrace life by the question _why not_ instead of always asking himself _why._

He shifts on the sofa just as he hears Harry’s door clicked open. He makes no move to turn knowing what was about to happen. He sees Harry come into view standing at the edge of the love seat his head cast down, his fingers playing with the hem of his cardigan.

“I’m sorry Niall I shouldn’t have walked off like that it was so rude of me and I apologise” Harry has always been this way constantly taking the fault with everything that happens. Pushing his emotions aside only to project what the receiving person wants. Sometimes Niall wants to tell him it’s okay to feel angry or to show displeasure when it’s something he doesn’t agree with or like but he knows it would only make Harry cower back in his already closed off barricade.

“It’s alright H” Niall smiles patting the spot next to him on the couch. Harry sheepishly smiles and sits down drawing Niall in a hug. They settle in silence with Harry leaning against Niall shoulders his feet tucked under himself as they watch telly.

“You know” Niall starts as Harry lifts his head off to listen “I don’t think he’s all that bad” Harry face scrunches up in confusion trying to figure out what Niall was referring to or rather who. Niall clears his throat turning the volume down on the television.

“Louis” Harry’s face falls as he shifts away from Niall’s space to go to the other side of the couch.

“I don’t want to talk about that”

“He’s only trying to do something nice for his friend I don’t see what is so wrong with that”

Harry breathes out heavily passing his hands through his thick hair.

“He’s artificial Niall he’s clearly just being nice to you for no other reason but to please his own selfish desires”

“That’s really judgmental Harry and we don’t judge people” Harry looks hurt for a moment his mouth already opening to spur an apology so Niall stops him. He knows he shouldn’t pull this card but he needs Harry to understand how much he wants this and now that it’s within arm’s reach he can’t have it.

“I really like Zayn” he says instead closing his eyes. He feels Harry’s presence immediately soothingly stroking his arms.

“I know you do” is what Harry says gently squeezing Niall’s upper arm. “I just want you to be happy but you also have to be careful Niall not everyone is an angel in disguise” and Niall does know that. He knows there are people who are self-absorbed and has wicked intentions, that not every act of kindness is genuine when so many people want something in return. But that’s just it right? If we keep letting paranoia take over our minds we will never live, we will never be able to accept that everyone is different who handle situations their own way, that every person has their own purpose. He likes to think that people just need someone to show them a way to make each other’s purpose a journey they find together. To learn from someone but to teach others as well. To share secrets and keep as if it’s his own. He wanted to fall in love with someone and have them love him just as unconditionally. Maybe those were his own selfish desires but sometimes the heart can’t stop what it wants and what he wanted was to live.

“I don’t choose who I like Harry it just happens” he opens his eyes to see Harry nodding at him.

“What do you want me to do?” Harry’s voice is small Niall almost misses it.

“I just want your support” Silence. Harry shifts close to him once more draping a single arm around Niall’s shoulders. “I know I took the oath and I’m not asking you for anything. I won’t put you through that” Niall was getting teary “but I do like him Harry” an insane amount of emotion rose to Niall’s chest. He blinks away the tears, his chest aching with the burn. He could never ask Harry to do something he wasn’t comfortable with.

Back then he was sure about his life, what he wanted and what he expected from it. He’d go to college, get his degree, and get a job. He’d probably find a nice wife at least that’s what his parents would have wanted for him, to settle down. He’d give himself to her only then and probably have a couple kids. That’s the model life, the one he wanted, the one he’s known for so long but now he’s exposed to a different life and it’s so refreshing not having to anticipate his every move or what he would do next. When he first got to college he wasn’t expecting to fall for the most gorgeous boy he’s ever seen. He remembers it like a prayer when he begged Harry to accompany him to the football match. He remembers sitting on the stands and the moment his eyes land on the field there he was with the perfect quiff and perfect smile when he waved to the crowds who shouted his name. He remembers the kiss he blew which Niall was sure was directed to him, he remembers the brief eye contact they held which felt like disaster and deliverance all at once. He remembered when he first found out the perfect boy’s name was Zayn and how he said it a million times just to feel the twisted feeling in his stomach. He dragged Harry every game they had after that more interested in Zayn than the actual match.

Niall never regretted anything he did in his life but after the first time he saw Zayn he knew taking the oath with Harry was a dreadful mistake providing that this beautiful man even liked him, he knew he’d pay the price. There was no way of getting Harry to even talk to someone he found attractive much less go out with them and it’s not wishful thinking to hope your best friend falls in love only so he can have a chance of his own. He’s not blaming Harry for even suggesting the damn thing it’s just he really likes Zayn Malik.

 

\---

 

In the next few days Louis was trying to come up with a way to even approach Harry. He had no clue what the kid liked or where he even goes to on campus he’s been to every pub and high hole this place has and of course he wasn’t there but where do you expect him to look anyways? No one knew who he was which was quite difficult and the interns at admin didn’t seem to know much of his whereabouts either. It’s when he’d finally broken his promise of not contacting Perrie and it lands him in here right now sitting across from her, a big smile on her face as she sips on her tea.

“You look good” Louis beams making a soft pink blush to cover Perrie’s cheeks. It’s honestly so cute the way she responds even to the slightest things.

“Thanks Lou so do you. Now are you going to tell me why I’m here?” She sets her cup down, smile gracing her lips, her nose ring shining in the morning light. The coffee shop is fairly empty this time of day only a few early starters. Louis isn’t even a usual if it wasn’t for today being leg day in gym with Liam he’d still be in bed.

“I need a favour” Perrie arches her eyebrows willing him to continue. “Do you know a Harry Styles?” Perrie gasps actually puts her hands over her mouth blinking rapidly as if trying to process Louis’ words.

“Harry St-“she shakes her head “I mean yeah I know Harry he lives just down the hall from me” She eyes him suspiciously.

“I need like his schedule or something or maybe somewhere he goes I need to talk to him” Louis is rambling trying hard not to look at Perrie because he knows she must think he’s lost his mind.

“Have you lost your mind?” See? Perrie gawks at him for a moment before realising how loud her voice was clearly attracting the attention of the few patrons in the shop. She leans across the table getting closer to Louis. “What did you do?” She asks skeptically and a bit worried. Louis has to laugh. He leans back on his chair tucking his hands behind his head.

“I didn’t do anything Pez” she makes a sigh of relief “well at least not yet” Perrie swats him on the head. He groans rubbing the spot frowning at her.

“Harry is a good kid stay away from him. I mean it Lou.”

“But Pe-“

“No. Whatever sick game you and Zayn have conjured up leave him out of it” There it is. The mention of Zayn. He was trying to avoid the topic, he certainly didn’t wanted to be the one to tell her Zayn’s moved on but

“Zayn’s in love with his roommate” He says in one breath and for a moment he thinks Perrie doesn’t hear him but when he watches, her mouth falls open taking in the words. Her eyebrows frown for a brief second before it’s smoothed back into its normal shape.

“What does that have to do with you then? And Harry. What does this have to do with you and Harry?”

“The oath” Perrie snorts because of course she knows what he’s talking about.

“Right I understand” Louis nods. “So what are you going to do then? I can assure you Harry isn’t into _this_ ” she makes to gesture at Louis who in turn rolls his eyes.

“Everyone is interested in this” He scuffs running his fingers down his body. Perrie rolls her eyes.

“Well good luck then. Today is Wednesday-“

“Yeah all day thanks for that”

“Will you let me finish bubble brain?” She makes to swat at his head again only this time Louis was expecting it so he ducks.

“Harry’s most likely at choir practice right now” She looks at Louis who just seems lost “In the auditorium”

“We have a choir?” Louis asks generally shocked. What else does this school have that he’s unaware of? Perrie just looks at him and shakes her head.

“Unbelievable”

“Okay so the auditorium got it thanks Pez!” he gets up leaving a smacking kiss on her cheeks. He rushes out only turning abrupt by the door almost knocking over a girl on the other side to look back at Perrie.

“The auditorium is where exactly?” Perrie bursts out laughing.

“The quad Lou use the map by the quad” he gives her a beaming smile nodding.

“Right the quad. Okay we’ll talk soon” He rushes out, she watches him make his way across the street and back on campus where he runs through the gates. She giggles into her hands before turning to take her cup of tea and bring it to her lips before mumbling under her breath.

“Idiot”

 

X

It’s like a whole new world to Louis when he steps into the sleek theater like building on the far south of campus. He’s out of breath by the time he’s reached but the cool AC from the building helps him calm his nerves. He inches closer to a glass door filtering out the voices he’s hearing around him. It’s getting closer when he hears echoing voices in perfect harmony invade his ears as Louis draws up to the room and peeks his head through the glass window. His eyes drift to the people trying to find a familiar face with wavy chocolate hair and rounded glasses. He finally spots him to the top row of the choir, his posture straight, his hands tucked to his sides. He’s singing his voice meshing with the others, his mouth opens insanely wide, his red lips wrapping around every syllable. Louis couldn’t help but admire the plush of them and he vaguely pictures if it feels just as soft as it looks. He swallows trying to get rid of his thoughts when a person clearing their throat jumps him away from the window.

“Can I help you Mr. Tomlinson? You seem lost” Louis definitely recognises her. She’s been to a few of the parties he’s thrown and he’s pretty sure she’s visited Liam’s room one too many times only to have to face him and his brothers in the morning.

“Ah Elgar just the person I was looking for” she huffs making a disgusted face at him.

“It’s Eleanor” He knew that. “Really?” she’s amused “I’ve never seen you here and I’ve been here for almost three years now so either you tell me the real reason you’re here or I call campus security to escort you out”

“Woah okay chill out” He steps away from the window walking a bit to the side so she has to follow him. “Well there is this guy-“

“He’s not interested” and how fucking rude? What a bitch Louis thinks.

“That’s not what I was getting at but thanks sweetie. Now if you’ll excuse me I just need t-“he walks over and grabs the door knob twisting it open. Eleanor comes and slaps her hand against the door preventing him from entering. He glares, her height almost towering him and for a petite girl she is sure fucking intimidating up close.

“You can’t just go in there asshole they’re rehearsing” Their little exchange seem to spark the attention of the people inside because Louis feels the door move against his back and next thing he knows he’s being pushed out of the way, a grey haired woman emerges from inside, her glasses tucked to the bridge of her nose, her face in a scowl as she looks at Louis and Eleanor waiting for an explanation.

“Headmistress Sally, I’m sorry for interrupting but this man was trying to go in without permission” Louis could only blink watching Eleanor squirm under the gaze of the woman.

“What is your purpose here football player?” She says it like Louis was a disgusting bug and she wanted to kill it. She dismisses Eleanor who goes back to the room in silence not even sparing a glance at them.

“I was actually looking for someone” The woman arches her eyebrows as if to say _Go on_.

“M-My-“Louis panics and the next words that tumble out his mouth was nothing but word vomit. “My boyfriend” the woman makes a grunting noise but accepts his answer. She folds her hands over her chest, her chin lifting in that poised and sophisticated way.

“Very well and who might this boyfriend of yours be?”

“Harry Styles” he says immediately when he hears a few loud gasps coming from the room. The woman turns back briefly to look, the people gathering close trying to eavesdrop moving away at the woman’s stare. Fuck she’s so scary, Louis is terrified. Other than that he just told a lot of people that Harry Styles was his boyfriend. Fucking great.

“Mr. Styles?” She calls summoning a timid looking Harry to their presence. He doesn’t even look at Louis even though Louis’ eyes are trained on him and his deer in the headlights expression with the head mistress.

“You have five minutes” she puts her hand out to indicate the amount of time “and please do not let this happen again” She bellows before turning and stepping through the door leaving Louis and Harry alone in the corridor.

“Y-yes headmistress Sally” Harry says even though the woman is long gone. He frowns looking down at his fingers, his feet closing in to his own accord.

“What are you doing here?” He whispers not looking up to catch Louis’ expression.

“I-“Louis deflates, now he feels bad because Harry would now probably be in a lot of trouble because he showed up here. “Can we talk?” Harry looks up frowning harder, his lips pouty as if Louis is speaking a whole different language he doesn’t understand. Louis is not endeared, he’s not except he is, trying to suppress a smile.

“We are talking” he points out and Louis snorts rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly.

“True” he shakes his head smiling. “I’m not sure what’s wrong with me today” Louis says more to himself than to Harry. He just doesn’t understand why he was lost for words when he was a natural at this-talking. It’s one of his best traits. Yet he finds it difficult to get two words out when Harry is biting his lips and looking at him like _that._

“I-I-“he takes a deep breath trying to calm his nerves and why was he so nervous? “I just wanted to apologise for the other day. I shouldn’t have disrespected you in your own home” Harry seems surprised at the confession a smile growing to reveal a sweet dimple on his left cheek.

“Apology accepted” Harry smiles fully now his other dimple showing, sinking deliciously in his milky skin. His eyes sparkle as he comes closer to stand in front Louis. His height towering him as Louis comes closer to look at his eyes. So green. Louis wants to reach out and push the glasses off his face just so he can have a better look at those eyes.

“Just like that?” Harry tilts his head confused. “It’s that easy?” Harry nods, his smile broadening.

“Well I still want to make it up to you”

“You don’t have to do that”

“No but I want to” Harry goes to protest already opening his mouth to speak.

“How does dinner sound Friday night?”

“I don’t” Harry swallows moving a step back from Louis. He was startling him and Louis knows if he doesn’t back off he’s sure Harry would run for the door and he’d never have a chance at this again.

“It’s just dinner Harry, to say that I’m sorry”

“But you already said you’re sorry and I forgave you” Well Louis really didn’t know how to reply to that.

“I have to go it’s already been five minutes and I can’t keep headmistress waiting” He doesn’t wait for Louis to answer but walks to the door. “Have a nice day Louis” he says only to disappear through the door leaving Louis slack mouth and dazed. What the fuck does he do now?

 

 

\---

 

“So I was thinking right, if we were possibly created from evolution then why is there still like apes and shit? Did evolution stop or something?” Liam slushed his beer shifting closer to Louis crowding his space in this already stuffed booth. Liam tends to get a bit of chatty when he’s had beers which results in him saying anything that comes to mind, it does serve purpose when Louis wants but not with the current situation he just wants Liam to shut up. Louis was so uneasy after the spectacle with Harry he didn’t even have the guts to tell his brothers what really happened. According to his version of the story he didn’t reach Harry in time and the headmistress kicked him out.

Liam is still talking non sense, this time he leans over to Zayn on the other side whispering something in his ear. Zayn giggles putting his hand over his mouth and to the outside world it would look like those two were flirting but to Louis it was nasty just thinking of them together so he tries to focus his attention to something else like the fries on the table and the idiot who decided that spreading ketchup all over it was a good idea instead of just a little dab on the side. He’s restless and he needs to stop this before he does something irrational.

“What are you talking about? You do talk some shit when you’re drunk” Liam rolls his eyes shifting back to Louis’ side giving him the necessary attention Liam knows he needed.

“I saw it on the discovery channel” A lope sided smile appears on his face as he tucks his chin on Louis’ shoulders. “You and me baby we aint nothing but mammals” he sung, well more like slurred, his voice rough and scratchy against Louis’ ears. He makes to push Liam when he doesn’t budge, his large body engulfing Louis, pulling his wrists so he doesn’t escape. “So let’s do it like they do on the discovery channel” Liam leans forward and licks Louis on the cheek causing him to squeal.

“You’re disgusting! Get off me!” Zayn and the others burst out in laughter, Liam holding on to his stomach looking more in pain than anything. Good serves him right. Louis was getting annoyed and he doesn’t want to think why. It is mandatory behavior among them on Friday nights, it’s been this way forever but today he just wasn’t in the mood. They could all sense his discomfort because usually Louis is the one talking shit and trying to embarrass the other boys. He pushes through the booth to get out, Zayn immediately stands as well following Louis to the washrooms.

“Hey what’s wrong?” Is the first thing Zayn says once they’re alone in the room. Louis goes over to the sink splashing water on his face trying to cool the burning itch just under his skin. Everything was shit lately and he couldn’t help but link them all to the Harry. It’s all his fault. It’s not that sort of thing, where he’s pining because that would just be ridiculous, Louis Tomlinson doesn’t pine. He saw it more like a challenge because there was no way anyone can refuse _him_ of all people, no matter how much they pretended like they didn’t want him and that’s what he’s trying to prove, that they are wrong. Church boy or not, everybody wanted this ass.

“I’ll get that date with Niall for you Z and I’ll do it before Christmas break” he gets that look on his face, the one when he’s pumped for a game, the determination set in his bones, the buzzing in his ears.

“That’s two weeks from now Lou that’s impossible”

“No it’s not”

“Listen its okay I can accept when someone is not interested in m-“Louis looks at him and breathes out heavily.

“Trust me he’s interested in you”

“Really?” The familiar shine in Zayn’s eyes light up with hope.

“Of course he is and Harry wants me”

“Louis”

“No I’ll up you one I’ll make him fall in love with me”

“Don’t be stupid Lou”

“No one refuses Louis Tomlinson” And Zayn wished he knew what the fuck that was supposed to mean but he just kept staring at Louis not knowing what to say. Louis rubs his hands together like a very clichéd villain in a movie, all he was missing was the menacing laugh.

“I don’t like this if you’re planning on hurting him” he turns to face Zayn.

“I’m not going to I just need him to admit he’s into me”

“You are so infuriating tommo”

“You won’t be saying that when you’re knee deep inside Niall” Zayn’s eyes widen, his cheeks heating with colour.

“Don’t say that”

“I can’t believe you’re acting like a blushing virgin right now. What has this boy done to my best friend?”

“He’s diff-“

“God don’t even finish that” he puts his hands over Zayn’s mouth. Zayn pushes him off clearly wanting to continue.

“But he is Lou, I get this weird feeling in my stomach when I see him and my hands get all sweaty”

“Spare me the rom com bullshit and here I was thinking you just needed some dick”

“I like him Louis”

“Right well you’ll be fucking him come Christmas break” Zayn rolls his eyes not bothering to answer. Louis fixes his fringe in the mirror pinching his cheeks to give a bit of colour. He turns to Zayn stretching his hands out.

“How do I look?”

“Like the pretty little twink I know you to be” Louis makes a scuffing sound, Zayn’s smile looks almost like it hurts, his eyes crinkling.

Now all he has to do is seduce Harry. No big deal. Easy Peasy.

 

 

\---

 

“Well it wasn’t easy but here we are, Harry free” Louis tries to joke even though Niall looks constipated. It really wasn’t easy getting him away without Harry finding anything suspicious but he had choir practice and Louis snuck Niall out his physics class to come to the diner they had first talked about meeting Zayn at. Which up to this point has been successful. Zayn however didn’t make it because he’s currently in his Stats class not by choice since his current attendance rate is nonexistent and if he doesn’t at least make 25 percent he’s going to fail the course, so no Zayn.

Its fine Louis can handle this, it’s only been an hour with Niall and Louis already feel comfortable with this boy. Niall was a very simple and easy going person, his hard shell and foreshadowing from Harry is what threw people off and Louis thought he’d make a great addition to the frat. However, Louis doesn’t tell him this out loud he just sits and entertains Niall with jokes and many stories of his best friend whom he seemed very adamant to know about. Louis was on his story about how Zayn snuck into Celtic to retrieve their school flag as per tradition with the rivalry of schools, and how Zayn was caught by the principal and almost got reprimanded of his place on the team when Niall’s phone obnoxiously rings on the table disrupting Louis from the best part of the story.

“Sorry I need to take this it might be...” He leaves the unspoken words in the air. Louis knew what he meant so he just nods and watches Niall pick up the phone and bring it to his ear. Immediately his face drops when he says _hello,_ Louis looking at him curiously waiting for Niall to continue.

“I’m sorry Harry I’ll be there in five minutes” he stops to look across to Louis mouthing _sorry_ as he listens to what Harry is saying.

“I’m-I just stopped for coffee” Harry says something else which causes Niall to bend his head sighing deeply. When he looks up again he gives Louis a sad look.

“I’m in the diner just off campus” he pauses “with Louis” the last words whispered. He hums after a few and then hangs up the phone.

“Harry is on his way over” Niall looks like he just rattled Louis out for murder making the older boy snort taking another sip from his cup.

“It’s okay Ni I was hoping I’d get to see him”

“Really?” Niall’s eyes light up, he’s more shocked than Louis expected him to be.

“Yeah Harry’s cute” Niall chuckles a strange noise coming from his throat as he smacks his hands over his mouth to stop himself. Louis rolls his eyes shifting his gaze to the door just as someone pushes it open and enters. Harry of all people appears looking lost, his eyes taking in the place, his eyebrows scrunch in that adorable way Louis hates admitting, causing his forehead to crease. Louis shakes his head trying to rid the thought and tries to think about how on earth Harry got here so fast when Harry looks his way, his eyes brightening with realisation as he makes his way over to the table. Niall doesn’t say a word when Harry approaches and neither does Harry who is just looking at Niall, rather staring at him not even acknowledging Louis’ presence.

“Well glad you can make it Harold, tea or coffee?” Harry’s eyes drift to him finally, his frown still deep, his lips pursed.

“My name’s not Harold” his voice is so low and soft, his head bowed so he’s looking at his feet. Louis ignores him standing from the table gesturing for Harry to sit.

“Come on Curly it’s just coffee” Louis gives up waiting for Harry and flops back on the seat. Niall’s eyes still casted on his hands firmly grasped together on the table.

“We have to go Niall” Harry reaches over, his pale navy blue shirt rides up as he bends over to grip Niall by the hand, his practically swallowing Niall’s and Louis gulps dryly trying not to think of what those hands can do and by that he means do to him. And no he’s brought back to the modern world and not some sick fantasy one where the idea of even entertaining such a ridiculous thought doesn’t exist. Louis has to keep reminding himself that it’s only because he’s not had sex in over a month that he’s having these thoughts about Harry.

“He clearly wants to be here Harold so leave him be” Harry frowns again when Niall resists him looking at Louis as if to ask for help.

“Will you stop calling me that?” He asks more like a plea than annoyance which only makes Louis stare at him. Harry’s stance is powerful and solid next to him, he’s sure Harry works out and under all those layered clothes is a well-defined body. Louis is sure Harry can pick him up without effort and send him flying across the store or pin him down and Louis would not be able to move. His jawline is sharp as he twists his head to look at Niall and then to Louis. Then he gets that dark look in his eyes and even with the worn out cardigan and chunky glasses Louis knew he should just tell Niall to leave.

“Ni I just remembered I have to meet Chase so I better get going” Niall’s face drops with Louis’ lie because just few minutes before he told Niall he didn’t have any plans until the night when he was supposed to be hosting a party for the new pledges. Harry looks at him a small smile appearing on his face as he steps out of Louis’ way so he could stand. Now that Louis was this close to him he can see the difference in their height, Harry was towering him making his already small body seem miniature next to his, and everything about Harry was just so big. His hands, his feet, his head, Louis couldn’t help but think of other parts which can be gigantic as well. He can feel his mouth watering with the thought so he stops himself, he must look so creepy just staring at Harry his eyes not even focused on his face but on the zipper of his jeans. Louis thinks it’s almost illegal for Harry to be wearing jeans that tight considering his dedication to church, don’t they have some sort of dress code? Louis feels even worse he’s had to draw such a stupid stereotype to Harry when he didn’t even know a thing about the boy. He swallows feeling just how dry his throat is, almost painful, the taste of his tea from earlier stuck on the roof of his mouth giving his saliva a bad taste. He looks at Harry once more before shifting his body getting the courage to move his foot away from the table. He’s just thankful he asked Niall for his number before so it shouldn’t be hard next time to get in contact with him. Third time’s the charm right?

 

 

\---

 

 

“That’s it for today just remember final rehearsals are tomorrow at eight. Check with Mr. Styles for the final draft of the programme’s layout. You are dismissed.” The headmistress fixes her glasses, turns on her heels to pace out the door. The crowd disperses, Harry grabs his bag from under the table just as students approach him to see the programme. The choir is set to perform among other choirs in a regional competition where the first place winner gets a cash prize of ten thousand dollars which goes towards the school for maintenance and supplies. It’s not the sole reason Harry joined, he loved singing, has been in various choirs throughout his life, the unexplainable joy he feels standing in front a crowd of complete strangers only coming together because of music and lyrics.

The final rehearsal happens in this very auditorium and it is basically a free invitation to the other students to get a chance to see how well the choir performs before the actual competition which is far more nerve wrecking for Harry since this year he is a lead vocalist with solos even.

“You’ll do great this year Harry don’t worry” Eleanor has been his only friend in this place since he’s been here well apart from Niall but he doesn’t count, Niall is family but it is still kind of pathetic that Harry can count the amount of friends he has on his hand. The people in his choir was friendly and he got along with all of them he just wasn’t anyone’s friend. Even though Eleanor can be vulgar sometimes which really doesn’t sit well with Harry he has grown to appreciate her since she was the one who kept pushing him and helping with his vocals which got him this solo in the first place. He smiles but doesn’t answer just as the last person takes the final copy of the printed programme in his hand. Eleanor waits for him to pack up so they can both walk out the room together. She’s quite pensive next to him, her eyes darting back and forth from him, he sees from the corner of his eyes how uneasy she is as if she’s building up the nerve to ask him something but she doesn’t know how to. He sighs stopping to sit on the small wall just outside the auditorium. Eleanor looks surprised but Harry smiles encouraging her to come sit next to him.

“What is it? Why are you giving me those looks?” She almost turns pink her cheeks tinting blending in with the afternoon sun, she bites her lips before breathing out deeply and looks over to him.

“What did Louis Tomlinson want?” Harry’s eyes almost pop out his head. “I mean, what did-how does he know you?” Harry has been trying to keep his mind off that topic for weeks and it was going smooth until now. Louis has been around for some time now and he isn’t sure how to even explain why. It's worse knowing Niall has become such good friends with him. Harry doesn’t want to think of why he never sees Niall anymore or why he’s always smiling down at his phone when Harry is trying to have a conversation with him or why he never shows up for church on Sundays and why Zayn is suddenly aware of his existence and makes it his mission to seek him out in the cafeteria or casually wave at him in the quad. Harry vaguely remembers the history Eleanor has with Louis well from what she’s told the rest of her friends in the choir and it’s kind of unsettling that she’s giving Harry this much attention when before she’s never asked or even bothered to approach him with personal questions or to talk to him about any other topic outside of the choir.

“Uh” he clears his throat when Eleanor scoots closer to him. “I’m not really sure he’s just always around” Eleanor snorts and he swears he sees her roll her eyes and he’s not sure if it’s because of him or because of Louis.

“Just stay away from him” and it doesn’t sound like a warning but her voice is full of malice and hate, it’s definitely a threat. Harry brushes it off because if she’s worried Harry would pursue someone like Louis, a boy, a _frat boy_ for better words then she has nothing to worry about. Harry wasn’t interested and he’d never be interested. Instead of answering he just nods standing again. She gives him a tight smile that doesn’t quite reach her eyes and stands as well.

They both walk in silence until Eleanor ditches him when she sees her friends in the quad. It’s a bit early and he hasn’t had much to eat this morning so he heads to the cafeteria when he spots Louis sitting on one of the benches, his feet resting on the top the table. He’s surrounded by people all decked off with the same maroon jackets, a signature colour of the school and fraternity house. He recognises Liam, the shaggy haired goalie who he helped tutor in Maths last semester, the other familiar blond who looks a lot like Niall only his body is a bit broader and his eyes are dark brown opposed to Niall’s very ocean blue ones. None of them notice Harry approaching so he thinks he can pass without problem but he hears his name which makes him shut his eyes and his pace to speed up. The voice continues to call out to him but he drowns it out by humming so it’s his own voice he hears in his head instead. He’s blindly walking along until he collides with a body, the person making an _umph_ sound which causes him to finally open his eyes to see Louis on the floor. He gasps bending immediately to help him up. The spectacle drawing a crowd as Liam and the rest starts laughing. Louis gets that annoyed look on his face smacking Harry’s hands away standing by himself dusting off his jeans attempting to fix his messy fringe off his eyes. Harry tries to hide his smile looking at how fragile and delicate Louis looks, his usual scuff shaved clean making his skin almost glow with the sun, his eyes, no way is Niall’s eyes that blue and it is an insult to even call Louis’ eyes blue because that’s just basic and it doesn’t really capture the different shades and lights or darks of them. This is what inspires artists to paint, to capture a single glimpse of the impossible and relying the sheer beauty on a canvas for the world to see.

He tilts his head scrunching his nose at Harry, his small hands reaching up to his hair again trying to get it to stay away from his line of vision. Harry’s hands are struggling to stay at his sides, trembling, begging to reach out and do it instead, to thread his hands and watch the way Louis’ eyes close because it would feel completely different to his own.

The snapping of fingers drag him back to reality, Louis is still looking at him, his lips slightly parted this time his hands are on his hips and his head is still tilted in that way that make him look even ten times more smaller than usual.

“Well?” he prompts “Are you just going to stare at me all day?” Louis’ voice rings in his head and he feels so stupid not knowing what he was even saying before all Harry can focus on was how soft the pitch of Louis’ voice was and it makes him think of how soothing it would sound if he sung.

Harry makes some kind of inhumane noise because he can hear the uproar of laughter from behind and he doesn’t have to look to see who or where it was coming from.

“I-I mean s-sorry” Louis cracks a smile his stance disappearing as his hands come to grip the back of Harry’s shoulder and he’s on tip toes, he has to stands on his fucking toes to reach Harry’s shoulders, the warm draft hits Harry and he finds himself slouching to make it easier for the smaller boy and if he leans into it then no one has to know.

“It’s okay Harold” Louis guides him away from the crowd and towards the back of the cafeteria where the gymnasium and the student guild office is located. It’s also very vacant and lonely which makes Harry’s spine tingle with the idea of being alone with Louis Tomlinson.

Louis finds an empty bench and sits carrying Harry down with him. Harry’s bag is in the way and he’s thankful since he’s sure he wouldn’t be able to handle the limited space between them. He can hardly breathe when he feels Louis’s hands rest on his thigh, a strange swooping feeling in his stomach, his heart beat accelerating and he’s sure he’s sweating. Louis is beside him a small smile on his face and he’s looking at Harry as if he’s waiting for something and Harry doesn’t know what he can possibly want but he doesn’t want to disappoint him.

“Are you o-okay?” Harry stutters out, his voice itching his throat, the warm feeling inside him eases as Louis moves his hand from on top his thigh.

“You’re like a baby giraffe, all limbs, honestly you could have taken out my eye” He dramatically touches his eye, the same one Harry saw him fixing his hair off from earlier and he feels even worse knowing he was the cause of that.

“I-I’m sorry”

“Do you do anything else besides apologise?” Louis tilts his head in that way again, his eyes crinkling to the corners as he smiles.

“I don’t know” Louis giggles, he actually giggles and it’s the most beautiful thing to witness the way his eyes close and his nose scrunch, how the back of his hand come to cover his mouth and his shoulders shake, his lips twitch trying to stay closed. Harry has lost his voice, he swallows feeling it stuck in his throat, the strange feeling in his stomach present again.

“You’re too cute Styles” The inside of Harry’s stomach practically doing summersaults now. This was definitely not the reaction he thought he’d have when someone complimented him, when a _boy_ complimented him. He tries to think of something other than a small smiling Louis and how his face reminds him of the sun and the warmth he radiates is why people wake up everyday ready to face the world but he can’t, the feeling in his stomach reaches lower, his blood rushing to that one particular spot and he’s not stupid he knows what an erection is and when he’s having one except this is one of the many rare times he actually does have one and it is because of Louis Tomlinson. He isn’t even doing anything, he’s not even touching him and Harry’s head is spinning as he feels the twitch in his pants, he tries to tighten his legs together to make it stop. Louis must see how affected he looks because he frowns and places his hand on Harry’s lower bicep gripping a bit so Harry can feel his fingertips sink into his flesh and it does nothing to help Harry’s situation if it’s anything he just made it worse. Harry closes his eyes and starts chanting a prayer and he doesn’t know if he says it aloud but he’s begging the Lord to make it stop, the ache he hates to admit feels good and Louis’ touch like fire on his skin, the shame of him for craving more. He opens his eyes to see Louis pure shock on his face, he’s gesturing wildly trying to hold Harry still, he’s saying something but Harry doesn’t hear, he shifts on his seat the zipper in his jeans rubbing against his flesh and it burns, he’s sweating, his breathing is shallow and rough, he feels like crying when Louis cups his cheek coming dangerously close to his lips, he’s looking dead straight into Harry’s eyes and all he can think of is how lovely Louis’ hands feel on him. He thinks of how it would feel if Louis touched him down there where it hurts and if it would be as soft and gentle like the way he’s stroking his face right now. He thinks of Louis’ eyes watching him when he’s touching him and he wonders if the blue hues would change into something darker or light and if he would be able to describe it, he thinks of Louis’ laugh and the ways he can try to make him do it again, he thinks of Louis’ voice and the way he says his name when he feels himself stiffen in Louis’ arms, his toes curl on their own, his eyes rolling to the back of his head, his insides exploding with insane pleasure as his mouth parts only to make his feelings vocal with a whimper. Then he feels the wetness, the warm thick fluid in his jeans, his shame. Louis is still looking at him, his eyebrows knitted together and he still looks adorable. Harry has to leave. When he feels his breathing go back to its normal pace and his heart rate eases he stands, his feet wobbly but he manages. His hands are shaking so he stuffs them into his pockets, he silently thanks God for his dark coloured jeans and its ability to hide his disgusting sin.

“I-I have t-to go” He sprints off, tears falling from his face as he replays the last few minutes in his head. The words spilling from his mouth, a mantra, a song. “Forgive me father for I have sinned.”

 

 

x

 

Louis showed up for the show the next day hoping he’d get to speak to Harry and find out what happened to him yesterday, he was acting so strange. Louis honestly felt like he was part of the Emily Rose movie and he feels awful for making the reference but Harry legit looked like he was being possessed.

 

x

 

Harry doesn’t show. The choir performs without him, Eleanor takes his spot as lead vocalist. The headmistress more displeased as she scowls from the corner but the show did go on. Niall ignores him even when he tried to tell him what happened, his only vague answer was that Harry was just under a lot of stress. Louis is beginning to worry which is bizarre since it’s an emotion he doesn’t tend to show very often.

 

 

\---

 

“Forgive me father for I have sinned” Harry kneels, his tears soak his face, his hands clasped together against his chest. He’s always been honest his whole life so he wasn’t hesitant when he relayed what happened to Niall who didn’t say anything which he was grateful for, only held him on for hours while he tried to stop crying and the thing is, this isn’t the first time something like this has happened, well to that magnitude, he’s had experiences, strange experiences when at the time he just thought something was wrong with him or that it was just a phase a lot of boys go through. He’s always been appreciative of people, always complimented them, always been honest and respectful. Harry didn’t think much when he looked at a boy and said he was pretty or that he found him to be attractive, he didn’t think much when he tended to notice boys faster than he did with girls or that none of the girls seemed to appeal to him, he didn’t think much when he caught himself thinking of boys and the warm feeling he got in his stomach much like how he felt with Louis these past few days. He pushed those thoughts to the back of his head because he didn’t want to think he was different from the other children when he wanted to like the same things they liked and do the same things they did because that was what fit the norm and he’s never had to deal with this until Louis.

“Go on child confess your sins” The voice from the other side of the box speaks. Harry closes his eyes, the vision of Louis’ eyes float in his head, the boy’s radiant smile clouds his every inch of mind, the sound of his voice and the way he says his name, the fact that he never calls him _Harry._ He starts crying again because he’s getting that feeling in the pit of his stomach again, the familiar burn present every time he thinks of Louis.

“I did something terribly wrong and I don’t know what to do or why I feel this way” Silence only the sound of his hard breaths and thumping heart could be heard.

“I think I may…” He takes a deep breath, swallows and looks up at the small wooden ceiling in this box. He closes his eyes again releasing the breath he’s holding in “like a boy” and as the words leave his mouth, his spine tingles, his bones chill and goosebumps appear on his skin. The horrid scenarios he played over and over in his head disappearing as he cracks one eye open to see himself still kneeling on the floor of this clustered box, he’s still alive and everything around him is still the same. There is no chaos, the ground doesn’t split open and the devil doesn’t take him to hell and it’s an exhilarating feeling to say those words aloud for the first time. It’s the first time he’s admitted to all those lost thoughts to the back of his mind, it’s the first time he’s allowing his real self to show, to allow himself to feel what he’s been suppressing for so long. It’s indescribable but Harry knows he’s going to be fine.

 

 

\---

 

                                                                                                                                     **_Only heaven I’d be sent to_**

**_Is when I’m alone with you._ **

**_-Hozier._ **

****

It’s the last day of school and then it’s finally Christmas break, a time everyone in college look forward to. It’s that time of the year when not only classes end and students don’t have to see the walls of this dreaded place until the next year it’s also the day Delta Psi has the most anticipated party of the year.

Things have gone sour for Louis since the choir incident, he hasn’t seen nor spoken to Harry since, making his little promise to himself and Zayn end tragically. He didn’t get Harry to admit he has feelings for him and it’s not just some stupid promise anymore, he doesn’t usually get the urge to see someone’s face everyday but he’s finding himself seeing the delicate features of one certain curly haired boy in almost everything he does or even says. It’s strange and Louis tries to convince himself that it’s just become habitual to him since for the past few weeks all he’s been doing, like a mission, was seek out Harry.

“Do you think he’ll come Lou?” Louis is currently in his bedroom fitting his very tight ass in a skin fitted black jeans. Zayn is sprawled out on his bed with a pillow thrown over his face. Dramatic, honestly. Louis wants to scratch Zayn’s eyes out because his life has been nothing but rainbows and fucking sunshine this past few weeks. Niall is so head over heels for him that he even ditches his bible classes to see him, he spends most of his time in the frat house with Zayn and sometimes Zayn goes missing in the middle of the night and it doesn’t take rocket science to figure out where he goes. Yet here Zayn was worrying over if Niall would show up to a party he is sure will attend even if it was the first party he’ll ever go to, he’d still come.

“Do my ass look good in this?” Louis turns from the mirror to look at Zayn who is looking at him with that stupid puppy dog face, puffy cheeks and pouty lips, batting his lashes. Louis snorts at him and goes back with fixing his messy fringe not even bothering to answer Zayn’s rhetorical question.

He grabs the first shirt he finds in his heap and slips it on doing a one eighty so Zayn can see him fully.

“I seriously need to get laid so I can stop thinking about that church boy” Louis says more to himself but Zayn obviously hears him. Zayn just smiles getting off the bed to fix his near perfect standing hair in the mirror. He turns and places a kiss on Louis’ head before walking out the room.

“I hope he comes too Lou” And that’s when Louis realises Zayn wasn’t referring to Niall.

 

x

 

 

Louis is buzzed no he’s more than buzzed he’s fucking wasted. His vision is blurred and his fringe is sticking to his forehead with sweat, his blood is hot and heat is emanating from his body due to the grinding against other bodies in this crowded living room. He briefly remembers seeing Zayn and Niall go upstairs to the rooms but after the drink a lovely muscled bloke handed him a while ago nothing was important but the feeling of his hard cock pressing against Louis’ ass and how shamelessly he bit his lips and pushed back even more trying to get closer to the stranger who smells like weed and musky cologne. The body behind him wraps their big strong arms around his dainty waist pulling him snug against his chest, almost locking his position so his ass is perfectly lined up with the man’s clothed cock.

“Wanna take this upstairs baby?” The heavy voice growls in his ears. Louis is swaying on his own, the alcohol giving him a pleasant buzz so he doesn’t hesitate to nod making a humming sound at the stranger to let him know he agrees. The man takes his hand leading him upstairs, he passes Liam on the stairs chatting with Eleanor and he doesn’t know why his feet stops moving but he does only to come face to face with both of them. The blond man stopping midway on the stairs looking back at him confused.

“I’ll be right up pumpkin. My room is the first door to the right. Wait for me” Louis says seductively to the man who licks his lips and nods. He walks off leaving Louis to a scuffing Eleanor and a confused Liam looking at him.

“Ella-Whore” he slurs giggling into his hand and leans to press his head against Liam’s shoulders. Liam steadies him but doesn’t move his head resting on him. He thinks he hears Eleanor say something like _fucking asshole_ but he’s too consumed with the feeling of his head spinning like a top to comment.

“You okay little sparrow? Should I get you a glass of water?” And there Liam goes with the mother hen behavior. He really appreciates Liam though, he’s always there for him, holding him on in the morning when he feels sick or making him tea to ease his headaches and rub his feet when it hurts. Louis takes a deep breath out trying to move his head so he can look at Eleanor again. She’s staring at him disgustingly, he feels Liam’s hand stroking his arm soothingly.

“Everyone wants me right Liam? So where’s Harry?” Even though he addresses Liam his face remains on Eleanor. She folds her hands across her chest smirking at him.

“So you do like him” Louis rolls his eyes and looks at Liam.

“Well of course I do why else would I wear these incredible jeans?” his words are rushed but he thinks that’s what he says even though his tongue feels heavy against his mouth. He rubs his hands along his chest and to his ass squeezing his cheeks to justify his point.

“I’m sure he likes you Lou. Want to sit?” It’s Liam’s voice again but this time he doesn’t wait for Louis to respond he takes his hands and ushers him to the living room to sit on the sofa. He pulls Louis down so he’s sitting half on top him and half on top Eleanor, which he is quite surprised is still by his side till now.

“Harry hasn’t been to choir practice in two weeks which is strange. I haven’t seen him since the competition” Eleanor explains while she’s doing something with his legs that feels like heaven and he doesn’t want her to stop. He rolls his head so he’s now lying flat, his head on Liam’s lap and his legs on top Eleanor’s.

“You think he’s avoiding me?” His voice is so baby like and airy it doesn’t sound like him but he’s looking up at Eleanor with big doe eyes and pouty lips.

“If he is then he’s stupid” Eleanor strokes his cheek with her thumb and smiles. They stare at each other for a few moments until Eleanor leans closer to Louis and he doesn’t move. She takes this as invitation, Liam just staring at both of them but he too doesn’t move as she inches closer to Louis’ lips with a pleasant lopsided smile. Not until Louis coughs and it’s a sick dry cough and he makes a gurgling sound before he shifts off Liam’s lap to empty his stomach right on his foot and the floor. Eleanor shrieks and gets off the sofa trying to avoid getting covered in vomit and Liam freezes closing his eyes, covering his nose and mouth so he doesn’t see what Louis has done on him. Everything from then on was just a big black blur, Louis collapses back on Liam, every sound disappearing, everything gone silent.

When he wakes up it’s to a fluffy pillow and blankets covering every inch of his sweaty body. He sits up too fast the throbbing pain rushing to his head and the bright blinding light from the sun making his stomach feel queasy he has to get off the bed and rush to the toilet. He chokes two fingers down his throat, anything to take away this feeling in his stomach, his muscles clenching as he dry heaves into the bowl until he feels satisfied does he drop, breathing heavy on the floor, his eyes filled with tears and the nasty after taste left in his mouth. He spends an awfully long time in the shower rubbing every inch of his body trying to get the stale stench of alcohol and sweat off his body until he feels satisfied does he retreat back to his room, body clad in a towel wrapped around his waist when he hears his phone ring off from the nightstand. He doesn’t want to deal with whoever that is and for some strange reason he’s thinking it might be Eleanor calling to find out about last night and he really doesn’t want to talk to her or anyone for that matter but the phone is annoying and the sound only makes his head throb even more than it does. He angrily grabs it looking down at the unfamiliar number until it stops. It starts up again but it’s a text this time. He sits on his bed unlocking his phone to look stupidly at the text that shouldn’t make his stomach flip like that and it’s not from the nausea he’s been experiencing all morning, it’s something else that feels oddly pleasant. He smiles repeats the words from the text trying to memorise it. His hands are shaking when he replies but he manages, throwing off his towel and dropping naked on his bed, his smile beaming as he bites his lips thinking maybe this shitty morning can turn around after all.

**_Hi Louis? This is Harry got your number from Zayn. I really need to talk to you. Can you meet me in the quad in 15? I’ll be waiting :)_**

****

The pit of his stomach feels weird again even though he takes the necessary medications Liam had left on his nightstand but the bubbly feeling is not from his hangover, his hands are sweaty and slightly shaking and the thumping of his heart beating overtime is definitely not from being drunk last night. He feels so suffocated as he sees in the distance, the wide open space of the quadrangle. An area he’s quite familiar to yet today it feels foreign with the people milling in and out, some sitting on benches with books on their laps and heaven knows why since semester is over and they have no reason to be sitting here looking at fucking books and the more Louis looks around he starts feeling light headed. It’s cool he keeps telling himself, fucking _relax,_ it’s nothing, it’s just Harry. He tries to smile looking around trying to spot the head of pretty hair but frowns when no one matches the description. For a second he thinks he’s been trolled and Harry was just playing a stupid fucking game with him and the second he assumes Harry just left. Harry must have gotten scared too and just ran off. He thinks maybe he read the text wrong and he wasn’t even supposed to meet Harry here or maybe he got the time wrong? He bends trying to retrieve his phone to look at the text again when someone clears their throat snapping his attention. He jumps back startled at the man standing in front him. Staring back at him was indeed Harry well at least he think it is, his eyes are the same without the exception of his junky black glasses hiding them. Louis’ eyes trail down the man’s body, he’s wearing a ridiculous pink shirt with flamingos on it and three of the top buttons are undone so his very perky nipples peek out and Louis sees hair, he’s shaved his chest hair but its growing back. His eyes continue to trail to Harry’s legs clad in a very tight black skinny jeans and the most awful looking brown boots Louis has ever seen but he thinks Harry is the only one that can pull that off because he looks absolutely ravishing. His eyes go back to Harry’s face taking in every detail carefully for the first time. He’s smiling and those lovely rose coloured lips glisten with how much he’s been licking them, his dimples sink so deliciously in his golden tan skin. Louis isn’t breathing he’s sure, his mouth is open and he can feel the heat in his stomach. It’s only when Harry’s hand go up to scratch at his head does Louis notice it and how could he not? It’s not fucking there, it’s gone all of it _gone._

“Y-You cut your hair” Louis almost doesn’t believe it, the long beautiful brown hair that hugged his sharp jawline and his face making him look delicate and soft is fucking gone. Shaved right off, the sides of his head is low cut making his little ears poke out, the top of his head a bit fluffier and messy falling effortlessly across his forehead. Who the fuck is this man and what has he done with Harry?

He furrows his brows which confirms to Louis that he is in fact not a fraud.

“Yeah I did”

“It’s gone” Louis pauses not taking his eyes off Harry’s head. “All gone” Harry giggles and Louis can tell he’s uncomfortable from the way he shimmers slightly away from him.

“It’ll grow back” Harry smiles, his voice soft as if talking to a child. He gestures for Louis to sit on a nearby bench, walking over himself and taking a seat. Louis is still standing however, watching him because it’s just so hard to believe that this is the same Harry that used to wear cardigans and khaki pants.

Louis needs air, no he needs more than air he needs to sit down and he needs a snickers, yes a snickers would be very nice right now thank you very much.

“I’m sorry this is just…” He sits next to Harry trying to find the right words to say, his focus now on the ground, he doesn’t think his heart can take looking at Harry right now. “You just look so dif-“

“Different yeah I’ve gotten that a lot” Harry laughs finishing for him. He wants to ask Harry a million questions, where were you all this time? What happened that day at the cafeteria? Is this some sort of new oath where you shave your head to signify a new beginning? But his voice gets stuck in his throat. He just doesn’t understand how in the world is Harry Styles so fucking gorgeous and he’s not even trying, sure he’s made a few alterations but he wasn’t even bad before, he was just hidden.

The silence beats on for a couple of minutes until Louis remembers the whole purpose of this meeting and he briskly turns to Harry who is playing with the hem of his shirt, his eyes look up to meet Louis.

“What did you want to talk to me about?” And Harry looks pained, like he also forgot why he was even here. He chews on the inside of his cheek, the adorable little crinkle between his eyebrows return and he’s just looking at Louis. His eyes drift from Louis’ but never leaving his face as if he was memorising every crack and bump and storing it in his brain.

“I wanted to ask you something” He smiles looking back at his lap and if Louis didn’t know any better he would think Harry was shy. Louis doesn’t think about what he does next he just needed to touch. He scoots forward catching Harry’s hand that was twisting his lip and holds it.

“What is it?” Harry seems startled but he relaxes when Louis starts smiling and rubbing his thumb soothingly on his wrist.

“I-well I know this really nice restaurant t-they have the best dessert. My mum used to take me and my sister when she visited me on campus and it’s really nice. The place isn’t all that extravagant but the food is great and I was just wondering because I know you like food-I mean everyone likes food but like-you eat-of course you eat-“ He groans slapping his face, he looks so adorable rambling and Louis’ smile doesn’t go away.

“Are you asking me out on a date Harold?” Louis sees the immediate change in his face, his cheeks ten times brighter and red, he still isn’t looking at Louis but he can tell he’s trying to hide his smile. He nods slowly closing his eyes.

“I want to hear you say it” He lets go of Harry’s hand waiting for him to open his eyes. When he does, he gulps licking his lips once more before speaking.

“Do you want to go out with me?” Louis couldn’t help himself, he doesn’t even care who sees him he smiles so much it’s painful, launching himself on Harry, wrapping his arms around his torso in a brief hug then letting go. Harry looks flustered but doesn’t do or say anything.

“Yes” Louis bites his lips “I’ll go out with you Styles” Harry smiles at that “but” and he frowns. Louis laughs.

“On one condition”

“Which is?”

“You have to come to the frat” Harry needs to stop doing that thing with his eyebrows because Louis can’t take how fucking hot he looks, it makes him feel like reaching over and pulling him for a kiss until the sink disappears.

“Well then how else would I pick you up?” And Louis doesn’t swoon, normally guys just text him and tell him to meet at a certain place he’s never really had a boy come to the frat all proper to pick him up so he doesn’t swoon except he totally does. It’s like Harry fell out a book, like he’s a clichéd heart throb in a movie coming to win the heart of the boy.

So he’s got a date with Harry Styles which proves Louis point. He won. No one is immune to Louis Tomlinson’s charm and good looks yet he feels like he’s lost but he’s glad that he did. Maybe losing makes you a winner after all. Or some shit like that.

 

\---

 

 

 

“Holy shit Harry is that really you?” Another thing about Zayn is that he doesn’t really respect boundaries and just doesn’t know when to shut up. He’s currently poking at Harry like he’s some strange alien, which Harry can well understand the curiosity but not when the attention becomes all on him. He swallows as Liam comes to meet him still at the steps of the frat house, he’s biting his lips trying not to look at Liam’s very intimidating glare and Harry is suddenly aware that Zayn and Liam are those very judgmental parents meeting their son’s date for the first time.

“Z you’re scaring him, come in Harry Louis is just getting dressed.” And Harry really wasn’t expecting big muscled man Liam to be the soft parent. Zayn is still glaring at him but makes space so he could step inside.

“Come sit” Zayn and Liam lead him to the living room where other frat boys are sitting around watching telly, bags upon bags of Doritos to Cheetos messily across the coffee table. When they see Harry almost all of them start to snicker, Liam hitting one behind the head for him to shut up.

“Behave” He hears Liam mutter to the boy same time another one speaks to him.

“So Harry is it?” Harry nods watching the blond boy who he thought could definitely be mistaken for Niall. He finds himself smiling at that. “How do you find the frat? Is it what you were expecting?” Harry frowns, actually taking a good look around for the first time. He sees many plaques on the wall, apart from the corner display of a trophy case and medals accompanied by pictures. He notices Louis’ picture, his is the last on the wall. He smiles looking at the delicate smile Louis has as he’s staring at the camera. He is sure that picture of Louis isn’t recent because his hair is moussed and soft not like his very signature messy fringe, his face is also bare of stubble. Harry would say he looks for the most around sixteen but it can’t be because Louis is in college, you’re not sixteen at college unless Louis is some secret genius which he doubts because he’s the president of a fraternity, not that frat boys are stupid or anything it’s just- okay and Harry needs to stop thinking.

“I guess I wasn’t expecting it to be this…” He hesitates tilting his head “quiet.” The blond boy starts laughing slapping his knee obnoxiously and then wiping his fake tears.

“Comedian this one” he is talking to another boy next to him who seems more interested in the game playing on the tv screen than the conversation and Harry is thankful for that. “I’ll keep you” he tells Harry just as he hears someone descending from the stairs, their shoes scuffing against the polished floors. Harry really wasn’t expecting this when he turned to look at Louis. He’s just – Louis is just so beautiful. He almost trips trying to stand watching the boy smile at him all bright with the blue beanie on his head. He’s wearing- Harry has to breathe, he wants to use the G word because Louis is wears jorts, with rips too. His grey hoodie almost two sizes bigger than his small frame and of course his signature vans. Except Harry notices it’s not his usual black ones but rather a more cream colour one that looks recently bought.

His eyes land back on Louis’ face where he catches a frown, Louis looks at Harry and then down to himself.

“You said casual is this not okay?” Harry wants to smack himself because of course it’s okay, Louis looks gorgeous not even having to put in an effort looking totally ravishing and here Harry is standing in expensive YSL boots and another silk shirt that took half his salary this month but it was worth it seeing the way Louis reacts to him. Harry nods because that’s all he can do only just remembering his head gear that shifts from on top his head. He still isn’t used to having short hair so he’s wearing this stupid black hat but Louis doesn’t seem bothered as a smile graces his lips once more before offering a timid nod. The boys hoot at them as Louis walks out the door first, Harry following slowly after him.

 

 

x

 

“You know your hair isn’t that bad, I like it” And if Harry hasn’t already fallen flat on his face for this boy he has now. He parks his car only giving Louis a small smile which may come across as rude but Harry isn’t used to compliments, he enjoys giving them but never having it returned so he doesn’t know how to respond. And he know it’s because of his habit of always touching his hair and always running his hands through it that Louis took notice of it in the first place.

They walk into the building Louis already frowning, confused as he finally looks at Harry with his eyebrows drawn together and his lips jut out.

“Why are we on campus? What happened to the restaurant? You literally just drove around the corner for our date?” At the word _date_ Harry’s stomach is swimming, the pleasant rush reaching up to tingle his spine. It’s nice that Louis considers this a proper date and he was fairly confident that he would like what Harry had in store for him so he just nods and continues to walk inside. A few minutes later, Louis is trailing behind, hands folded tight across his chest and his face still set in a frown as Harry leads him to a familiar double doors of this end of the campus. The muffled sounds of music comes through the walls, the piano being most prominent as Harry glances back at Louis he can slowly see a smile spread across his face. His eyes light up as he approaches Harry, his mouth slightly part as he reaches out to grip at Harry’s bicep.

“Is that-“ the double doors open and out comes a spritey girl with a pink wig and Louis’ eyes bulge out, mouth opening wider as he looks at the girl lighting up a cigarette.

“Harry I can’t believe you did this. How did you even know?”

“I-I” his hands come to brush his hair like he would normally do, a nervous reaction, except the hat is in the way and his hair isn’t long anymore, right. Louis is looking at the girl who is now talking on the phone.

“I had no idea the school did this play. Grease is my favourite”

“I know”

“You do?” Louis tilts his head confusion taking over his features.

“Yeah uh P-Perrie kind of told me”

“Perrie?” Louis looks like he doesn’t believe it putting his hand over his chest. “Of course” He lets out a throaty laugh before shaking his head and watching the floor. He bites his bottom lip sheepishly looking up to meet Harry’s eyes.

“Shall we? Show starts in five minutes” Harry gestures for Louis to go in first, looking back at the very convincing Frenchy before pushing the doors open and entering, Harry following closely behind him. They take seats three rows from the front, Louis’ eyes never leaving the stage and Harry’s never leaving Louis’ face. It’s a strange feeling for Harry but the look Louis has on his face right now Harry wanted that look to remain there always and he strangely felt pleased knowing he was the reason for it and he wants to always be the reason of it. That’s when he mentally decided he was going to do anything in his life to make sure Louis is always smiling and happy.

 

x

 

“I played Danny when I was in high school” Louis kicks at the pebbles by his feet avoiding looking at Harry as they walk along the grassy path “it was embarrassing” the evening’s orange glow gives its surrounding a soft and calming feeling.

“Really?”

“Yeah, Perrie didn’t tell you that?” Louis stops walking to look up at Harry only to catch his frowning face.

“I guess I’d rather hear these things from you” Louis clears his throat, the blush creeping on his face, continuing to walk along campus. He easily slips over to one of the benches scuffing his shoes in the damp grass, Harry comes and sits a good distance away from him on the bench.

“Did you have a good time?” Louis turns to face him, his soft fringe falling over his eyes because of the dreaded humidity. He looks so soft in the evening light, the moonlight just about touching his face with the golden hues and Louis thinks he’s never seen someone so beautiful. He swallows trying to focus on anything but the glistening of Harry’s red lips or the sparkle of his emerald eyes.

“Yeah” his voice comes out airy and it’s so obvious what’s on Harry’s mind right now. It’s screaming at him, piercing his ears, suffocating his lungs _. Kiss me please._ And he knows he has to let Harry make the first move. He’s always been the one to put out and if he has the slightest chance with Harry he doesn’t want to make things awkward by doing something that will make Harry uncomfortable. He knows about Harry, he’s not sure about his experiences with men or his experiences with anyone for that matter, has he ever been kissed? And it’s hard because Harry is looking at Louis like he wants to be kissed, he puts his hands on his thighs drawing his face even closer to where Louis  is and he suddenly feels crowded like he can’t see or breathe properly and Louis absolutely detests it. But no matter how inviting Harry is right now he can’t do it.

Instead he clears his throat and stands, scratching the back of his neck awkwardly.

“I guess we should head back it’s getting late” His voice is robotic and forced he can’t even look at the disappointed look etched on Harry’s face. They walk in silence and it’s deafening the way Harry would shift closer to him, his hands gently brushing his own, begging for Louis to just reach out and grasp them, the small touches sending shivers down Louis’ spine and it’s shameful to think he’s never had that feeling before.

When Harry dropped him off he couldn’t be more thankful to see the inside his room what he isn’t surprised to find however, was his brothers all with grins on their faces the moment he steps into the frat. He tries to ignore them taking the steps two by two before one of them even open their mouths to ask a ton of questions he really wants to avoid right now, he paces up the stairs and up to his room when a gentle hand lands on his shoulder making him freeze. When he turns he sees Zayn, that look on his face and Louis couldn’t help it. It’s some kind of unspoken telepathy but he looks at Zayn and it’s as if his eyes relate the unspoken story because next thing he knew Zayn has his arms wrapped tightly around him and he shamelessly buries his face against Zayn’s neck. He smells of that really sweet cologne Louis always give him shit for because it smells like mangoes. Zayn’s beard scratches but it’s familiar and Louis doesn’t understand why he’s feeling this way. Disappointment for most. Maybe because he blew the first good thing to come his way since forever. Maybe he should have kissed Harry. He’s not a person to court someone, he’s not a person to have feelings, he just meets someone he likes fucks and moves on so the things he’s feeling now is out of his league and he’s confused. Zayn ushers him into his room still wrapped in his arms and lays them both in bed. Louis immediately crawls closer to Zayn not bothering how they looked, Zayn was warm and Zayn was comfort. He doesn’t know when he starts crying but Zayn is carding his hands through his hair whispering soothing words, pressing soft little pecks on his head and that’s how Louis falls asleep, tucked in the arms of his best friend, his mind drifting to another boy and thoughts of him is what eases him enough to close his eyes.

When he wakes up in the morning it’s to his cold empty bed minus Zayn. He can’t say he’s surprised even though Louis hates waking up alone and cold he knew Zayn was an early springer and is probably at the gym with Liam right now so Louis has to wallow by himself and nothing ever turns out well when Louis is alone, it only allows his thoughts to run on Harry again and it makes him feel like crying because even though it was just last night he saw Harry he already misses his voice and his face and it’s definitely new territory for Louis, dangerous territory. He walks downstairs only to hear laughing in the hall seeing yet another surprise on the couch, Chase and Eleanor with her hand resting on his thigh and Chase with a blunt in his hand. When Eleanor sees him she stands smiling forgetting Chase to make her way over to him. He doesn’t have the energy to face her right now so he just rolls his eyes and allow her to pull him in a hug.

“How are you feeling? Liam told me to check up on you” and he should have known, Liam being mother hen and all. But he’s fine actually, he’s not sick he just has this stupid boy in his mind and he doesn’t know how to stop. Maybe he was sick.

“Tommo want a hit of this?” Chase gestures to the joint in his hands and as tempting as it sounds he just wasn’t in the mood.

“Want to talk about it?” Eleanor puts on that voice like Louis is a child, sugary sweet and he appreciates it but she isn’t Zayn. He needs Zayn.

“I just want cuddles” he sounds so pathetic but Eleanor’s eyes light up, rubbing at his shoulders.

“Okay babe anything you want. Let’s go back upstairs, I’ll just make you some tea and I’ll be there to cuddle you in about five minutes” it does sound like a good idea so he nods and waddles back upstairs waiting for Eleanor to come up. He’s about getting settled in bed when his phone goes off on the nightstand, he really should ignore it but he still grabs it and answers.

“Boo? Are you there?” Louis really regrets answering. He breathes out heavily finally finding it in him to reply.

“I’m fine Mum”

“You don’t sound fine love, I got a text from Zayn saying you weren’t feeling well. What’s wrong?” And he really hates how involved his friends are in his life, Zayn always blow things out of proportion and this unnecessary worry goes to shit because Louis was absolutely fucking fine.

“I-I just have a headache okay mum it isn’t the end of the world. I can handle myself”

“No need to get defensive baby I’m just worried about you” Same time Eleanor comes in with two steaming cups in her hands when she notices Louis on the phone she creeps quietly over to the bed setting the cups down and gives Louis a beaming smile.

“I know you are but I promise you I’m fine”

“Do you want to come home baby? I know you’re not supposed to be here for another week but maybe you can come a few days earlier? I know classes are over so why not” For one he still had a lot of things in the frat to take care off and second he just needed the extra time to prepare before he decided to go home to a house full of women. Don’t get him wrong he loves his mother and sisters but it does get a bit overwhelming sometimes. “Zayn was excited when I mentioned it said he could bring up Liam and he really wants me to meet this new boy of his” Louis’ heart almost gives out. Zayn has been talking to his mum about Niall. This is serious because Zayn has never talked about one of his flings with his parents before, it makes Louis smile. Niall isn’t a fling and he needs to stop saying that.

“That sounds great mum yeah I’ll see you tomorrow then” Of course he’d give in to her. It’s his Mum.

“Oh honey I can’t wait! The girls will be so pleased they miss you so much Boo, I miss you”

“I miss you all too mummy I’ll see you tomorrow. I just took a painkiller I should rest”

“Okay baby rest well, I love you”

“Love you too bye” he hangs up watching Eleanor smirking at him.

“You are too cute” she exclaims smiling ear to ear.

“Just shut up and cuddle me” she salutes to him giggling and draping her hand over his waist when he lies down. Louis being the little spoon.

 

 

\---

“Okay I can do this” Harry says placing his laptop on the bed taking deep breaths and relaxing trying to find a comfortable spot to lay. He looks down at himself half naked, his briefs filled, dick swelling, the darken wet spot evident of his shame. He slips off his briefs, cock springing and dropping on his stomach, hard and almost painful to touch. Harry bites down on his lips, close to tears as he reaches over to his laptop and presses play.

Niall had suggested this “relief” method as he called it, told Harry that this was a good way to relieve himself whenever Louis got him riled up and it would help control his situation in his pants so that he won’t embarrass himself and combust in front of Louis again. Now just half an hour after he dropped Louis off at his frat did it take him to start sporting yet another painful erection. To his defense Louis is just too ethereal. Maybe irresistible. A true definition of temptation. The way he looked almost shy when he was telling Harry about his past and how he seemed surprised when Harry actually wanted to know more. How he looked almost angel like in the afternoon glow, the blues of his eyes matching the sky and his smile warming the atmosphere. Harry wanted to kiss him so bad. He just didn’t know how to, he never kissed anyone before and he wasn’t even sure if Louis wanted to be kissed.

The way he would bite his lips Harry couldn’t help but think of him doing it instead making the pink turn a nice shade of red, he thought of Louis and the sounds he would make if he did.

The video comes to life, Harry breathing heavily now when he sees a very muscular man enter the room and walks over to a dainty looking boy sprawled out naked on an office desk. And Harry shouldn’t be this turned on, his cock is twitching on his stomach and he’s afraid the moment he touches himself he’s going to burst. Instead he spreads his legs and bites his lips closing his eyes.

His hands run down his chest stopping to press against his nipples. Those too are hard and begging for attention. He pinches at it arching his back off the bed at how surprisingly good it feels.

“Louis” he moans continuing to pinch at his nipples, he sucks on his fingers before bringing them back, the hot saliva feeling cool against his skin. He feels even worse for thinking of Louis but he can’t help himself already getting visions of Louis and he wants to feel like this, wants to feel Louis and touch Louis and be with Louis.

His hands trail finally coming closer to his cock, runs his hands on the inner side of his thighs, groaning and picturing Louis biting on them, Louis and his perfect mouth, kissing him there and marking him, looking up at Harry and smiling. Harry never felt closer to God than right now. His hand finally find his cock gripping tightly at the head. He thinks of Louis and his hot mouth engulfing him, sucking him down, Harry’s hands start moving just a little, trying to find a rhythm, a steady pace. His foreskin rolling down and his pink angry head peeking out. How Louis would probably lick down mouth glistening with spit, how his eyelashes would fan across his face when he looks down trying to focus on nothing but getting Harry there. How he’s bob his head faster when Harry starts chanting his name begging for more. Harry’s hands speed up the slick slide from his pre come allowing him to move his hand smoothly, the head red and swollen, his back arching, his thighs twitching, his mouth parted and eyes squeezed shut thinking of nothing but Louis. Louis’ mouth, his hands, Louis’ eyes, his thighs, his big fat coc-

“Fuck” Harry whines stiffening for a moment as he takes in the shocks of his orgasm rocking his core and every inch of his body. Come covering his hand and parts of his stomach some even making its way close to his chest and chin. He passes his hands over his stomach smearing the come even more trying to catch his breath still coming down from his high. The video is still playing in the background, the little twink is being pounded over the desk by the muscled man, Harry raises up to shut his laptop flopping back on his bed bonelessly. He can’t even feel bad anymore, he can think about the consequences of what he just did later but the feeling right now is all that matters. The only regret he has was not being able to do this for years, how much he’s been missing out on and the incredible feeling still buzzing on his skin.

 

 

x

 

The next day he awakes only because he hears Niall’s loud voice echoing the halls, he shifts opening his eyes to reveal the piercing hot sun shining through his window, he groans sitting up feeling gross because he fell asleep last night with come on his stomach and the laptop still by his feet. He crinkles his nose and gets up immediately heading to the shower.

When he’s done and feeling refreshed he goes outside to see Niall pacing the floor on his phone. He’s frantic and he’s never like this. Harry notices a small tote bag on the kitchen counter, Niall rubbing at his eyes.

“Morning Ni!” Harry tries, Niall whipping around to spot him as he enters the kitchen going over to make a cup of tea. Niall gives him a wave and continues on the phone ignoring Harry once more.

“I know babe I’m just really nervous” he says as Harry comes to take a seat on one of the stools.

“Yeah Harry’s awake” Harry looks at him frowning. He covers the phone to address Harry “Zayn” he whispers returning to his call. “Okay I’ll be there in ten minutes” he hangs up coming to take the seat next to Harry. They stay quiet, Harry sipping on his tea and Niall playing with his fingers a nervous habit Harry is aware of so he waits for Niall to speak first.

“Haz?” He finally responds breaking the silence looking at Harry knitting his eyebrows together.

“Mm” Harry says around his mug swallowing a sip.

“I have to tell you something” Harry puts his mug down turning to face Niall.

“What’s wrong?” Harry is suddenly worried the events of last night may have reached to Niall somehow meaning Niall heard him wanking and even worse he heard him wanking off to Louis. Harry is motified, he will never be able to explain to Niall why he did that.

“I-“he gets cut off when his phone goes off in his hand. “One sec Haz” Harry nods getting off his seat to refill his cup. “Louis?” he freezes. “Yeah I told Zayn I’ll be there in a while I just have t-“ silence. Harry recovers refilling his cup trying to act subtle because Niall was on the phone with Louis, the same Louis he fucking wanked off too last night.

“Yeah he’s right here” he perks up, heart rabbiting in his chest as he turns to find Niall staring at him. “No I haven’t told him yet” more silence. Harry stays stood next to the fridge looking at Niall like he holds the answers to all life’s questions. “Well I was just going to but then you called” he frowns listening to Louis and glancing to Harry every second. “Yeah okay bye” Niall hangs up resting his phone on the counter.

“Is everything all right?”

“I’m going home with Zayn so I can meet his parents” They both say the same time. Harry gasps, his mouth opens wide, his eyes as well.

“What?”

“Louis invited me last night. We’re staying by Louis for a few days and then we’ll be driving up to go meet Zayn’s parents”

“You’re staying at Louis’?” He’s baffled. If Niall is meeting Zayn’s parents then why does this have to involve Louis?

“Yeah he said his mum really wants to meet Zayn’s new boyfriend” At that Niall smiles almost blushes as he watches Harry.

“But-“

“I know how this looks Harry but you know how much Zayn means to me”

“When are you leaving?” Niall stands coming over so he’s close to Harry.

“In an hour” Harry’s head is spinning. This is unusual behavior from Niall, he’s never kept Harry out of the loop before, since the beginning it’s always been Harry and Niall. They were a pair, the dynamic duo. “Louis feels bad you’re being left out so he asked me if you wanted to come” A pity invite? No thank you and besides he cannot handle being around Louis for that long.

“It’s fine Niall I’ll just call Gems and tell her to come up”

“Are you sure?” Niall looks skeptical like he’s contemplating whether he should actually go or not and Harry knows if he told Niall to stay he would but he can’t be that selfish and deprive Niall his happiness.

“I’ll be fine. Go on then don’t want to be late” Harry ushers him out the kitchen, dragging him to the door, picking up his tote bag.

“I’ll call you when I get there” Niall shouts but Harry doesn’t wait as he slams the door shut sinking to the floor. The burn in his throat is present again, his eyes sting with the salty tears. And why was he crying? Why does he feel this way? He hardly understands any of it, just when he thought he finally had the courage to do something that would probably change his life forever of course God had to punish him and send Louis away. He was really hoping during the break he’d get to see Louis and be with him. He wants this so bad he doesn’t even know how to put it in words but what’s worse is the sick feeling in his stomach, the dreaded fear that Louis doesn’t feel the same way he feels and that whatever this is between them is just come charity case for Louis and once the hype dies down he moves on forgetting Harry moving to the next one when Harry wants to be the only one.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things start getting spicy.

Jay is in the kitchen washing the dishes as Louis stands next to her with a washcloth waiting to dry them, it's the simple things like this does he miss, the life he once knew ia all but a memory, his new and luxurious type taking over making things as simple as washing dishes seem ancient to him but he loves it. He loves that he gets to be in his mother's company, hasn't had that much time with her alone but not when all she can talk about is Zayn's shiny new toy.

"I can't believe Zaynie has a boyfriend! Oh that Niall is such a delight! What a sweet boy" She gushes handing Louis the few remaining washed dishes. He rolls his eyes because yes Niall is a delight and Zayn has a boyfriend now can we all just move on? It would seem the jealous bug bit Louis hard sometime during their journey here but for the past six hours all everyone can talk about was Zayn and Niall. He's honestly had enough. It's just troubling because he knows his mother will eventually pester him about his love life and he really doesn't want to be thinking of Harry right now it's why he agreed to come here in the first place to get away from him.

"Yes Mum I'm so happy for both of them" he deadpans tucking the dried dishes on the rack before slinging the cloth over his shoulders and turnig away from the sink to look at his mother who has made her way on the other side of the island. She looks at him for a second and he knows it's coming, he can see it in the way her eyebrows raise expectantly and Louis never thought he'd say this but thank _God_ for Niall who walks in the kitchen and stops her from saying what he knew would cause an argument between them.

"Why are you two cooped up in here when Zayn and I are waiting for you to start the movie?" Jay practically laughs long forgetting Louis and her merciless questions about why he doesn't have had a cute boyfriend like Zayn to bring home too. Honestly he thanks God again. They walk back into the living room to see Zayn hunched over by the player already inserting the movie and makes his way to the love seat to join Niall already sitting. Jay takes the single couch and Louis opts for the long one pushing Lottie off so she can join the rest of them on the floor. The movie plays but Louis feels himself become heavier with sleep, when he looks over he sees Jay eyes stuck on the screen so interested in the movie, Zayn and Niall to the side of him curled up in each other's arms. Lottie is hugging Felicite two of them sleeping as well as the twins. Feeling put off he stands rubbing his eyes, yawning on key.

"I'm off to bed, Goodnight" he calls. Jay looks over to him briefly nodding then going back to look at the screen, Zayn the only one calling back a reply to him.

When he reaches his room, his old room he smiles taking in the small bed he was once too small for, he smiles at the huge David Beckham poster on his wall, the same he's watched while he got through more than one orgasms. He flops on his bed turning to check the time on his phone on the nightstand. The small icon on his screen instantly makes the fluttering in his stomach intensify. It's a voicemail. Somehow deep down he had a feeling who is was, rather he hoped it would be him so he slowly dials the number waiting to hear the message.

 

...

 

There is just somethings that need to remain unspoken that much Harry knows so when he dialed Louis' number and left him the most embarrassing voicmail Harry just wanted the earth to split oopen and let the devil take him away already. What was he even thinking? He's sure that kind of language isn't even legal but it's hard trying to control himself when he's got Louis Tomlinson on his brain. Guess we can say he's  got no control (HA!)

Ever since Niall introduced him to porn his life has changed and he just can't seem to replace the actors on screen with a certain feather haired boy he knows and then he would imagine what it would feel like if he was the one of top him, or behind him actually just the other one basically and he isn't sure if those thoughts should even be in his head but it is anyway. Even in church he can't concentrate and he feels guilty coming to a place this sacred and thinking of leaving bite makrs on the inner parts of Louis Tomlinson's thighs.

 

...

 

Louis wakes up fuzzy, bright light flooding his room forcing him to screw his face to get used to the harsh setting. He sits up looking around his room sudden remnants of last night come rushing to his head all at once. The voicemail, the fucking sexy and hot as fuck voicemail from Harry. How does he even know about those things are beyond Louis but he doesn't complain, Harry has the most sexiest voice on the phone and he just knows the right thing to say, if Louis got off to it too then certainly no one has to know either. However it does leave Louis more confused than ever. Was Harry drunk? Of course he wasn't Harry probably never even had a sip of alcohol before, maybe he was high? That's even worse than being drunk come on Louis be realistic. Maybe he really did like Louis? Scratch that one out because that was definitely not it, if it was, which it isnt, then Louis was fucked. Not literally of course even though that would have been much better than being fucked figuratively speaking. Anyway, he doesn't get attached, it's just not in his nature and he's tried to convince himself that this feeling he has towards Harry is nothing more but physical and he's hoping to God for once in his life that it is mutual to Harry. Even if he'd never admit it feels nice having the thought of someone as beautiful as Harry actually liking him as a person.

 

 

x

 

Before anyone knows it Christmas had fast approached, Louis was lucky to have Zayn and Niall this year with him even though most of his family couldn't stop talking about what a lovely couple they make and kept insisting Louis needed someone in his life too.

Everyone was planning a small dinner for Louis' birthday, currently all his sisters along with his mother and himself, Zayn and Niall have gone to the mall while the older ones stayed back to help prepare for the "party." He's lost Lottie and Fizzy somewhere in Victoria Secret and Niall keeps pulling Zayn into every store which makes Louis frustrated and more of a third wheel than anything. He quietly slips away from them making his way to the food court. There's a Santa greeting children and Louis has to laugh when he sees his mother and the twins in line. Jay spots him and waves him over. When he gets there he's not surprised with her request.

"I'll just be back Lou stay with your sisters" So much for having some alone time but this is good too he's occupied. He huffs as the line moves slowly, Daisy pokes him clutching on to his coat because she's the one afraid of the chubby man. He reassures her every few seconds until they're in front and Louis is interupted by a very familiar voice. He looks up only to see Harry dressed in an elf costume bending on the floor talking to a little girl. Just as he makes to look away he hears someone call his name. Harry's head snapping up at that and when Louis looks over he sees fucking Eleanor also in an elf costume smiling at him. He refuses to look at Harry as Eleanor slouches down to his sister's height. He vaguely makes out her saying that she's taking them to see Santa when he sees Harry from his line of vision. He steps back so the people behind him can move forward but also so he can make some space between Harry and himself. Eleanor comes back shortly with both sisters in her hands, they're carrying candy canes and smiling from ear to ear. She hands over the girls to Louis also placing a candy cane in his hand.

"For my little munchkin" smiles moving to place a smacking kiss on his cheeks. He hears it before he sees it but when he finally looks over Harry is stumping off leaving his post almost running towards the exit leaving Louis to swallow harshly at this very confusing interaction.

"What's wrong Lou?" Eleanor pulls him out of his trance, she's staring at him looking so adorable and ridiculous all at once in that elf costume. Louis tries to smile looking at her and then to the direction Harry went. Eleanor immediately picks up.

"Oh I probably shouldn't have done that" she wipes Louis' cheeks where she kissed him trying to get rid of the lipstick she left behind,

"Do you know where he went?" He tries not to think why he even feels this way or why was he so concerned that Harry saw Eleanor kissing him or why he feels fucking guilty and he didn't even do anything. Eleanor smiles and tells him Harry usually goes to the roof on his breaks and he might have gone there so he thanks her and leaves telling her to keep an eye on his sisters until he gets back.

He sees the stairwell as he goes straight up the restricted area that reads  _Roof Area_ in red. The door slightly ajar so Harry has to be here. He enters carefully looking around to see if he spots Harry. He's sitting on the edge of the building, his back to Louis, his feet swinging off the building.

"Harry?" He tries carefully moving forward. Harry's head wipes back to look at Louis, shocked at first but he's sniffing and takes his hand and passes it over his face, swinging his feet so he's back on the roof again.

"What are you doing here?" He asks almost annoyed still scrubbing at his eyes willing for the tears to stop. Why the fuck was he even crying? Louis can't help but feel endeared by the way Harry's eyebrows are drawn together and he's got a little pout and it makes Louis smile. With the silence Harry decides it's best if he continues. "Why don't you go back to your girlfriend" he spits the last word not even looking at Louis as he attempts to walk pass him to get to the exit. Louis' smile grows and just as Harry reaches the door he answers.

"Are you jealous Harold?" Louis teases not being able to keep the grin off his face. Harry freezes, eyes widening, cheeks turning rosy. He swallows trying to compose himself. He was not jealous. He's not.

"Don't call me that Lewis" And it's his turn to laugh as he found the name change quite funny. He hears Louis laugh out loud and turns to see him with his hand on his stomach and Harry's throat tighten because Louis looks s fucking good. All bundled up in joggers, the ends tucked under his socks and his blue beanie over his head. Harry wants to hug him and press kisses on his face just to see the pink colour appear and he wants to tickle him just to hear that bubbly sound that makes Harry's inside light up.

"So you don't miss me? Can't even say Hi?" Louis is a little shit. Harry thinks just for a brief second that maybe Louis never heard the voicemail probably deleted it but with the glint in his eyes he's sure the bastard thoroughly enjoyed it and this is just to get Harry worked up. He doesn't move or say anything just watches as Louis walks over to him. He bends suddenly pretending to fix his socks but really it's just so Harry can get a good look a his ass, a nice one at that. He swallows feeling it in his veins, he's fucked. He closes his eyes, think about Jesus, think about anything but Louis' ass for the love of God please don't think of his ass. But it's too late he already feels himself getting hard, cock thickening in this very tight pants. Louis looks at him biting his lips coming closer.

"Harold?" He doesn't even realise, his eyes still closed until he feels Louis' breath on his face, he gasps pulling pack clearly surprised at the close proximity. Louis looks like he's been burnt and Harry wants to take it back to move forward and wrap Louis in his arms, kiss him until he's breathless but all he can do is stand there watching in horror.

Louis' face falls as he turns and walks off not saying another word, Harry watching unable to do or say anything. He watches Louis disappear before he curses at himself and adjusts his hard on feeling fucking stupid and frustrated.

 

...

 

Later that night Louis clearly buzzed from his mini party and still thinking of how fucking stupid he must have looked parading in front Harry and acting like Harry could actually be jealous to see him with someone else, he gets a string of messages, all from Harry. Because of course.

 

**10:20pm**

**Happy Birthday Lou!**

 

**10:56pm**

**Hope you're having a good one sorry about earlier wasn't feeling too well. Talk soon maybe?**

 

**11:09pm**

**I'm sure you're just busy that's why you're not replying okay bye, have fun!**

 

**11:45pm**

**I did you know...I mean I do. I miss you every second, every minute, every hour, every day.**

 

**12:01am**

**Merry Christmas**

 

Louis wasn't crying. Fuck.

 

x

 Christmas passed by pretty quickly Louis having forgotten the Harry incident he likes to call iy, never heard from him since that day and Louis decided that he's not going to let that affect him and certainly not obstruct him from having fun. So here he was over at Stan's place, his childhood best friend talking about organising a New Year's Eve party that's going to be epic. According to Stan. And this is his thing, his zone.

Unfortunately Zayn and Niall fled since they both decided to spend it with Zayn's family so it's just Louis and his old school friends but he's not complaining, they always knew how to have a good time.

Evening rolls in and Louis leaves Stan to go get dressed for tonight, he's a bit tired to so he thought a nap would do him good and would make him feel refreshed for the party. After a few hours, nap accomplished, he gets dressed and heads to Stan's house.

The place is packed, Louis can hear the loud music from outside the hard thud pounding against his chest, there are people littered all over Stan's lawn and he's sure his mother would not appreciate that one bit in the morning. He makes his way through the house looking for Stan or anyone he may know as a matter of fact. Some random faces he remembers from school call out to him as he makes his way to the kitchen where he hears people chanting, amoung those are of course Stan. They are all shouting at a person to keep chugging form the keg on the ground, he can't see who it was since the person is on his hands and Stan and Calvin is holding him up. The crowd erupts in cheers at the person wiggles his legs, Stan patting him pushing his feet to the floor so he can stand. Calvin goes over to the crowd collecting money and it's a scene all to familiar to Louis. Typical frat party. He waves at Stan and when he sees him parts the crowd onl to hug him and gesture to meet this so called newbie beer chugger champion. Louis freezes when the stranger stands up dusting off his shirt passing a hand through his hair. Stan claps him on the back and pulls both of them together so they're standing closer to each other.

"This is the best friend I was talking about Harry. The one I know would have beaten your ass in beer keg" Harry's eyes are hooded, he's wearing a mesh black shirt that leaves nothing to the fucking imagination. He's fucking plastered he can't even stand on his own.

"Well I was hoping I'd run into a legend" he slurs his words, swaying, Louis is sure if Stan moved he's fall flat on his face. He just looks at him all red faced and sweaty, his hair all over and it makes Louis unbelievably possessive and protective. Harry is clutching onto Stan's hand for dare life as Louis shifts so he can take his spot.

"You two know each other?" He just vaguely nods at Stan trying to escort Harry out of the crowded kitchen. Harry keeps tugging at his hair and touching his face probably trying to figure out if this was real or not. Miraculously they make it up to Stan's room. He pushes Harry onto the bed undoing his shoes, the boy already curling up on himself, groaning while he grabs at a pillow to hug. Louis stands still thinking Harry's already fallen asleep until his voice travels groggy and raspy through the room.

"Louis" and it's such a gentle way, Louis makes to move and sits on the bed next to him. He reaches out his hand to Harry just to assure him that he was in fact here.

"I'm here Haz shhh just go to sleep" he soothingly brushes Harry's hair as he cuddles up pulling Louis so he can movee closer to him. Upon hearing Louis' voice Harry seems to have sobered up raising from the bed in total shock.

"Y-You're here" he touches Louis' cheeks not believing it, Louis leaning shamelessly into it. He just decides he can't hide this anymore, he can't pretend this isn't happening and that Harry means nothing to him.

"Yeah I'm here" he covers Harry's hand with his own rubbing at the soft flesh. Harry smiles, fluttering his eyes, stays silent for a few moments until comes a soft murmur, like a whisper or a secret.

"Can I kiss you?" Louis is not sure he's heard that right but the light is shining on Harry's face and he can see his eyes glistening as he stares at Louis' lips. He wants to so bad but he know now isn't the right time. Harry is out of his mind and he's clearly not thinking straight (No pun intended) he pulls away shaking his head watching as Harry starts to frown and his lips turn in a pout.

"Go to sleep Harry" he reaches out to pet his hair, Harry moans closing his eyes, he looks like a kitten, too adorable as he preens from ore, Louis gently pushes him so he's lying back on the bed and pulls the covers up to his torso. Harry's breaths even out, Louis is about to walk away, to move his hand from his hair but the moment he does Harry's hand come to hold his, squeezing.

"Don't let me go" Harry murmurs already falling into sleep. Louis rises from the bed trying not to wake him again, tucks his hands in and leans in so he's watching Harry and the way his eyelashes curl and how his breath hits his face, so warm and inviting. He's so close to him and Louis feels everything. It just comes crashing down that this boy under him is everything and he wants to give him everything. He can't keep lying to himself anymore, there is just somethinh about Harry Styles.

"What have you done to me?" He whispers close to tears, his lips ghosting over Harry's. "I can't" he closes his eyes feeling the tears spur out "I can't let you go now even if I tried" he continues lowering himself, dipping to finally press his lips to Harry's, to feel the soft red plush that he's been dying to feel for months. Somehow this feels monumental and Louis know this is the moments everything changes between them and there was no goiing back and he isn't sure he's okay with that or not. Harry makes a small noise and settles again as Louis straightens up to press a kiss to his forehead then exiting the room.

 

x

 

The new year had served well for Louis even though Harry Styles consumed most of his thoughts he tried to drown them with extra practice and even taking up a drama course this semester that Perrie was the lead in.

Zayn and Niall was apparently house hunting since things were going so well for the pair, honestly Louis just wanted them to choke, but in a good way. Just for being so in love and happy. Fuck all that. Since that night he hasn't managed to cross paths with Harry and he's grateful even though Niall would often try to subtly bring him up in conversations obviously trying to find out what happened between them to have it end this badly. He of course stayed mute.

He's currently lounging in his living room when the very happy couple walks in and joins him on the couch.

"Hi Lou" Zayn beams, he's radiating sunlight which is probably due to last night when Louis overheard them fucking like animals. He didn't think Niall had it in him. He ignores them going back to the programme on the screen. And it's some french indie film he has no clue about but he didn't need this conversation. He just wanted to be left alone. He just came from four hours of football practice for fuck's sake.

"Anyway babe I'm really happy for you" Niall says bending to give Zayn a quick peck on the lips and wait what? what is he happy about?

"What?"

"Oh so now you're interested?" Louis rolls his eyes if they have to be assholes then fine he can too.

"Tell me or don't tell me I don't care" He does in fact care alot and if it wasn't for Zayn knowing him this well it would just make him look like a giant twat with an even bigger attitude.

"One of my pieces got accepted into an actual art gallery Lou! They're going to showcase it next Friday" Zayn cannot stop smiling and Louis forgets everything pulling Zayn into a crushing hug.

"I'm so proud of you I know you could do it" He lets go of Zayn still smiling.

"Thanks Lou" Zayn kisses the crown of his head.

"I get tickets to the show if you want to come?"

"Of course Z I wouldn't miss it"

"Alright then I'll leave it in your room" They disperse once again leaving Louis in the living room alone.

 

...

 

Harry couldn't really understand how he ended up in this situation but he's pressed up against a wall and a tall dark stranger is straddling his legs. His lips dry and crack and certainly not as soft as Louis' which he felt for just a brief moment. A moment he wished could have lasted forever. A moment he plays in his head over and over like a dirty record player because that was not part of his grant imagination it happened in real and even if Louis was hard headed he knew what he felt was mutual to how Harry felt. It's why he pushes the stranger off and pulls his pants up wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. The toilets are not a good place to give quickies he's figured.

"Haz!" As soon as he exits trying to fix his hair he hears his name being shouted from down the halls. It's Niall.

"Oh I was just heading to class" Niall gives him a disapproving look, narrowing his eyes.

"Tell me you're not still doing that in the toilets no less" Niall throws his hands up exaggerately trying to mask his disappointment.

"Do we always have to make our meeting about me? Not that I'm complaining but I'm sure you must want some of the thunder Ni" He's turned into an absolute dickhead since the Louis thing. To his defense he thinks Louis is a coward who can't admit his feelings and a person who just tells you he'll never let you go but does it anyway and for that he's a liar and a cheat for kissing Harry when he thought he didn't know. If it's anyone's fault it's Louis'. His irrational behaviour, why he spends his time jerking off strangers in their fucking washrooms is because Harry can't stand that he's in love with such a selfish person. And for that he needs to take away the burning pain in his blood streams always screaming for one person and it makes him numb, he can't stand going to sleep every night still feeling the shocks run through his body when Louis touched him or that the first thing in the morning he can't bare to open his eyes and see blank if Louis is not the one beside him.

"Right, well Zayn has tickets to the art show I told you is showcasing one of his pieces and I just wanted to know if you'd like to go?" What the fuck would he do at an art gallery? It's just rich stuck up pretenious pricks who think they have the slightest idea what art is. But Niall is loooking at him shining like the sun clearly proud of his lover's achievements and Harry can't say no so nods. Niall jumps holding him in a hug.

"I'm so proud of him" He hands Harry a ticket and skips off. Fucking couples honestly.

 

 

x

  


"Louis honestly hurry up we're going to be late!" Zayn shouts at him still trying to get his hair to stay up like his. Fucking hopeless.   


"Keep your panties on please I just need t-" He takes the comb smearing a generous amount of gel is his hand.   


"Let me" Zayn takes the comb raking it through his quiff and in one swift move manages to stay put. "And I don't wear panties Niall does" He slaps Louis on the ass.  


"Gross you fucker" Louis swats him in the stomach.  


"Hey that's my boyfriend you're talking about!" Zayn makes to punch him on the arm but Louis runs off.  


"It's still nasty I didn't need the mental image of Niall in lace panties"  


"It's quite the sight" Zayn licks his lips and Louis wants to throw up.  


"Just please stop talking"  


"Not until you tell me we can go"  


"Fine" He takes his cologne spritzing a bit on his neck turning to face Zayn. "Let's go"   


Zayn exits where Liam and Niall are waiting for them downstairs, the rest of the brothers already left to get things started.  


"Ready to go?" Liam asks Zayn nodding and Louis not even bothering to answer when the front door opens and in walks none other than Eleanor and Harry. Immediately Louis scowls disgusted and looks at the traitors themselves, Liam, Zayn and Niall.  


"What the fuck is he doing here?" Harry seems amused snorting and wrapping his arms around Eleanor. Louis honestly never wanted to vomit blood this much in his life.   


"I invited him duh now can we go?" Zayn tries to make it casual but there is no way in fucking hell Louis was going anywhere with Harry.  


"Well you'll just have to go on without me"  


"Louis stop acting like a child" This time it's Liam and he knows better than to open his mouth right now when Louis looks like he's about to murder him.  


"Yeah Lou stop acting like child" Harry echoes and Louis' blood boils. Why was he even this angry he has no fucking clue but the adrenaline running through him right now he feels fucking invinsible so it's why he smirks taking out his phone and dialling a number. After he vaguely tells the person on the other side to meet him there he hangs up, pushes pass Harry and walks to the car. Tonight is definitely going to be a good fucking one.  


  


When they arrive, the gallery is lit up in coloured lights each matching the colours of the painter's work. Harry is already bored as they make their way inside.   


Zayn stops to meet a few people alot of them dispersing on their own, he still has Eleanor in his arms and it's so weird holding her this way but she agreed that this was the only way to make Louis jealous and finally confess his feelings for him so he could endure this hetero bullshit for a few more hours.   


He looks around trying to spot Louis after he went off looking for his apparent "date" he supposedly invited tonight.   


"Alright Harry I'll need you to calm down but look" Eleanor leans to whisper the words pointing her finger to the direction for Harry to follow. When he does all the wind is knocked out of his body because there Louis was, giggling with his arms around another man's waist, the man ducking to place his head in between the space of Louis' neck and chin. He sees fucking red. He wants to walk up to them and punch the fuck out of that motherfucker and he wants to tell Louis to go fuck himself and then probably ask him to fuck him too. This is so frustrating.   


"I need a drink" He turns not even bothering to look at the stranger's face and Eleanor follows him to the bar.  


"It's alright Harry he'll come around" Eleanor pats him and takes the drink he offers her. They sit there sipping on drinks until he feels pleasantly buzzed their little bubble getting burst when someone clears their throat.  


"Harold have you met my date?" It's Louis, beautiful fucking stupid Louis and his big head, old fucking hag looking dick head of a date with his high quiffed hair and fucking beady eyes and his- Oh fuck isn't that  


"Harry?" Harry is stunned because this is the tall fucking stranger he tried to get off with in the washrooms on campus.  


"Nick" His mouth tastes bad very fucking bad and it's not the alcohol.  


"You two know each other?" Louis looks confused like his plan to make Harry jealous went south since they both definitely know each other.  


"This is bloke I was telling you about babe" Nick relates to Louis his face twisting trying to figure it out.  


"From the t-toilets?" Louis barely whispers and the moment the words left his mouth he could see the hurt across his face. Nick laughs nodding and Harry presses his hands to his eyes.  


"I-I'll be back" Louis tries to school his face walking away.   


"Are you okay?" Nick calls but doesn't make a move to see if he was. "Drama queen I tell you" He rolls his eyes going over to Eleanor who already has a drink waiting for him.   


Harry doesn't bother answering but getting up following Louis out the door. He sees him walking down the road all alone and it's fucking freezing.   


"Louis wait!" When he hears his name it only makes his pace quicken trying to get away from Harry. This isn't a tribulation that was going to stop him anyway Harry starts running catching up with him, gripping his arm and holding him in place.   


"Let go of me!" Louis screams wiggling his arms away from Harry.   


"If you promise not to run away" Louis rolls his eyes but nods. Harry lets go.   


"I'm sorry" Harry says watching as Louis folds his arms against his chest looking at anywhere but him.  


"For what exactly?" Harry ponders for a moment there are so many things he wants to tell Louis right now all the things he's feeling.  


"For everything, for clearly hurting you with Nick" Louis scuffs.  


"You didn't"   


"Well I'm still sorry"  


"Well if you think I'm going to forgive yo-" Harry pulls him closer by the waist. He pressed up against Harry unable to move, his eyes looking straight into his.  


"I'm not finished" Louis breathes in closing his eyes, Harry continues "I'm sorry for being scared and for running away and not being able to deal with this the right way, I'm sorry for being selfish and wanting something I know I can never have, I'm also sorry for all the times that I've used your name to make myself come" Louis' breath hitches "And all the times I've touched myself thinking of you. I'm sorry that you're the only think in my mind and that you're in everything that I do and everything that I say, you are the moon in the sky lighting up my night and you are the sun and stars that helps me go to sleep and wake up. But you know what I'm not sorry for?" Louis opens his eyes to stare at Harry, he slowly shakes his head. Harry smiles one of his hand coming to cup Louis' face, his thumb running under the soft flesh of his cheek.   


"I'm not sorry for being in love with you"   


"Ha-" Louis is crying breathing coming in staccatos.   


"Can I kiss you?" Harry whispers already closing in the space between them. Louis nods. Their lips touch and the fireworks goes off in Harry's head, the electricity runs through his veins. He kisses slowly savouring the taste of Louis and taking what he can get but Louis opens his mouth allowing Harry to lick inside, he's making little whining sounds gripping the back of Harry's head. Harry sucks on his bottom lip finding a rhythm and enjoying the sweet taste of Louis. He pulls away shortly, breathless but can't resist, can't stop now that he's done it. He goes back in kissing Louis again then letting go.  


"I've wanted to do that for so long" Louis is the one who reaches over this time pecking him once in the mouth. He blushes and bites his lips when he pulls away.   


"Can I take you home?" Harry is really fucking brave right now even though his heart is rabbiting in his chest and he feels like he's floating. Louis laughs and grabs ahold of his hand.   


  


  


...  


  


They are back at the frat, the place empty since everyone is still at the art show. He escorts Harry up to his room, leaving the lights off and going over to sit on his bed. He's playing with his fingers and Harry honestly finds it adorable, everything about Louis is adorable.   


"Harry?" his voice is small once he's spoken and just from the tone Harry can tell what he's thinking.   


"Yeah?" Harry feels him instantly bending to place a kiss on his neck. Harry shifts trying to face him and when he does Louis climbs on his lap hooking his legs on the sides of Harry. He's spreading light kisses on Harry's neck stopping only to suck down on a spot using his hot tongue to sooth afterwards. He's griniding down on Harry and he can feel his hard cock against his own, Harry's senses on overdrive.   


Louis stops holding Harry's face in his hands. "I want you" He says it almost desperately like he's been hiding this secret for so long and he finally feels relieved to tell someone. "I've wanted you for so long"   


"And you have me baby, I'm yours" Harry reaches up to kiss him grabbing his ass from behind. Louis moves up groaning against Harry's mouth.   


"I-I.." He pauses "We don't have to if you're not ready" And this is where Harry knows he's chosen the right person to wait for. Sure he's given a few hand jobs but that's it he couldn't bare anyone touching him that wasn't Louis, he wanted Louis to be his first everything and his last.  


"I want to...with you"   


"Are you sure?" Louis' eyebrows knit together.  


"I love you Louis I'm sure" Louis kisses him once.  


"You can fuck me" He blurts grinding down on Harry's lap. "I want you to fuck me"   


"Yeah baby?"   


"Yeah" Harry nods flipping then in bed so he's lying down and Louis is on top of him.   


"I want to make this special for you, I'll make you feel so good Haz" Louis pulls off his shirt and tosses it to the side sliding off his jeans and briefs so he's completely naked. Harry stares because Louis is really just fucking gorgeous too gorgeous for words, he is unreal.   


"Thank you babe" And fuck he said that outloud but no matter it's the truth.   


"What is?" Louis looks confused and Harry said that bit outloud too. He shakes his head crawling down Harry's body stopping to undo his jeans. His cock springs to life and the moment Louis touches him he feels liberated. This is what people talk about when they say that they saw a light at the end of a tunnel. He closes his eyes relishing in the way Louis' hands feel on him, a perfect fit. Not until his eyes shoot open when he feels hot and wet engulf him, when he looks down Louis is licking the underside of his cock then moving back to place his lips on the tip of his dick hollowing his cheeks and opening up wider to take more of him into his mouth.   


"Fuck Louis that feels so good" He puts his hands on top Louis' head holding onto his hair, Louis moans around his dick spit dripping down his chin and he looks obscene and so fucking hot.  


"Stop baby you'll make me come" Louis bubs his head a few more times before pulling off to look at Harry. His lips red and swollen and his mouth glistening with saliva.   


Louis bends just as Harry makes to take his shirt and jeans off by the time he's done Louis produces a condom and a bottle of lube and hands it over to him.   


"I'll ride you" He whispers biting down on Harry's ear after he says it.   


"I-I don't know how" Harry replies feeling dumb that he doesn't know what to do at this point.   


"It's okay babe I'll show you" He takes the lube from Harry's hands bending so his knees are on the bed and Harry is spawled under him. "Just have to open myself up a bit" His hands go behind his back, his fingers disappearing one by one.   


"God Harry" He moans rocking back on his fingers, Harry licks his lips swallowing as he watches Louis finger himself open. His cock is heavy hanging on Harry's stomach and he feels the need to do something rather than just sit there and look stupid. He reaches over and tugs on Louis' cock. "Wet your hands first" He hands Harry the lube as he slicks his fingers up running his hands over the smooth flesh of Louis' pretty cock, the foreskin rolling down to reveal the pink head. Harry's mouth waters. He moves down Louis body so he's now situated over his cock and he's sure if Louis just sits on his face he wouldn't mind either it's an incredibly beautiful view. He inches up holding on to the slicked cock with his hands opening his mouth already tasting him on his tongue.   


" _Harry_ " Louis cries out as he feels Harry's mouth on him. Harry does his best trying to suck in his cheeks the way he's seen so many people do in pornos and he tries to mimick exactly the way Louis did it to him, it must be working because Louis is moaning his fingers working himself faster. Harry grips his waist pushing his body down on his face. Louis begins to slowly thrust into Harry's mouth feeling his cock hit the back of his throat, his eyes clouding with tears, his jaws feeling like it might burst open but it's a pleasant burn making Harry's untouched dick to twitch.   


"I'm ready I'm ready Harry fuck me before I come" Louis shouts pulling off from Harry and dropping to the side to allow Harry to put on the condom. He doesn't even know how to do that. Louis puts him out of his misery slipping it on for him, every touch intensifies for Harry already feeling the pit of his stomach light up with pleasure. Louis straddles his lap placing his hands on Harry's shoulders. Harry guides him over his cock feeling the tight muscles of Louis' ass brush up against him. Harry grabs ahold of his waist lowering him down slowly feeling him stretch around him going down taking him bit by bit. Once Louis bottomed out he breathes heavily chasing Harry's lips holding him on for a brief kiss.   


"Can I move?" Harry nods against him already picking Louis up and dropping him back down, following his slow pace.   


"Fuck baby" Harry bites at Louis' shoulders as he moves. Louis throws his head back "You are so beautiful" Harry cries as Louis' pace speeds up, he's getting and Harry can tell the angle isn't doing it for him nor is the pace. Harry flips them so he's on top engulfing Louis with his big musclar body.   


Harry starts moving, pounding into Louis as he tightly shuts his eyes and bites his lips.   


"Open your eyes baby I want to see you" Louis opens his eyes staring at Harry and he was right. The blue of his eyes are dilated it looks almost grey his pupild blowed ten times bigger than usual, he reaches down to stroke his dick as Harry continues to pound inside him. Louis cries out holding onto Harry as he comes spilling between them, Harry is almost there too he dips down to capture Louis' lips in a kiss when he releases Louis holds him in place whispering in his ear.

"I love you Harry Styles" And that did it for Harry coming by shouting Louis' name like he's in church dropping boneless on top him.  


They stay like that for some time until Louis complains that Harry's giant body was suffocating him and he had to move.   


"How was that for your first time?"   


"Getting cocky now are we?" Louis kisses him and gets up to go to the toilets. He comes back with a cloth and throws it Harry who now takes off the condom and tosses it in the bin and wipes his torso where Louis' come started to dry.   


"So am I the best you ever had?" Harry smiles beaconing Louis to come to him.  


"You're the only I ever had can't really make comparisons baby" Louis swats him but buries his face in Harry's chest.  


"We should get some sleep Louis Tomlinson we have church in the morning" Louis stops to look at him.  


"Are you being serious?" He asks incredulously, blinking several times.  


"Yes" Harry says serious tackling Louis to the bed.   


  


  


  


 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you once again for reading. This is my first lengthy fic and even though it took me ages to write it was well worth it. Hope you enjoyed it as much as I did :) xoxo


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